IWA REPORT
Vol. 23, No. 9 -- Summer 2018
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JOHNNY B SAYS

You should have received a voting ballot with your league bulletin this cycle, which concerns our "six holds in a row" rule. As this is (currently) a core component of our play system, it is absolutely vital that you weigh in on the issue. Complete the ballot and return it with your matches for next cycle. Don't let other managers decide the outcome for you.

Our other important announcement this cycle involves the addition of a major title to the IWA! The last time this occurred was early in 2009, when the Metropolitan title was born. The new Elite Championship will be contested for by leagues with a limit of, at most, six wrestlers per manager. The starting line-up consists of the ASL, BBL, BRL, CWL, DXL, GNL, IWL, LNL, LWL, NWL, SHL, UNL, and XPL. We will crown the first winner in the August cycle, to coincide with our 33rd anniversary.

Besides the $25,000 in imaginary money and 10 free matches awarded to our other Specialty champions (American, Asiatic, and Hardcore), the Elite Champion may receive a real-life championship belt! The included leagues must average 50 cards collectively for the belt to be on the table; in other words, since there are 13 leagues competing for the title, they must have a total of at least 650 cards. A further stipulation is that only an Elite league which has 50 or more cards in a given cycle may win the championship that cycle. These requirements should hopefully ensure that belts will only go to those most deserving.

Elite status is available to any league which already has a limit of six or fewer wrestlers per manager in place. Leagues created with a qualifying limit, such as the new Louisiana Purchase Ligue, must complete one year of play before choosing to become an Elite league. The players in a league can, at any time, vote to raise or remove the league limits, thus permanently removing its Elite status. Elite leagues must have at least 50 cards in two of the 10 most recent cycles to remain in contention for the title, but their status will be reinstated once they have 50+ cards in two of the five most recent cycles.

If you're not yet a member of an Elite league, there's still time to transfer and/or create up to six new wrestlers in the ASL, BBL, BRL, CWL, IWL, SHL, and XPL. The following leagues do not allow transfers, only brand new wrestlers: the LWL (each manager owns a single wrestler, and it costs $5 to join, which includes your wrestler's creation, five matches, and a battle royal entry), the UNL (you must create exactly two wrestlers, one national and one international), the GNL (this league has a three-wrestler maximum), the LNL (you are limited to four horror-based "monsters"), and the DXL (you must spend a minimum of $12 on matches each cycle, but they are three-for-$1). The NWL is only open to rookie managers. The LPL targets fans of history and statistics, and may decide to become an Elite league next year.

This new title is yet another manager suggestion brought to life! We really do read and consider every idea you send us. Someone will soon be wearing the proof of that statement.

Next cycle, witness the unveiling of our 50 State Champions!

 

HALL OF FAME INDUCTEES -- engraved plaque

Martin Markos of Michigan

Francois le'Chevalier (LWL) 1,667-492-84, $2,449,000 *15
A black van pulled up in front of City Hall in the small commune of Haut-Rhin in northeast France, population 1,600. As the door slid open, Big Rye stepped out, reminiscent of a dozen clowns emerging from a car at the circus. He brushed the crumbs from the front of his shirt and shoved two wadded-up power bar wrappers in his pocket before reaching for the sky, stretching his massive arms over his head, when he was bumped from behind.

"Make room. I am cramping up back here... I can't sit for another minute," Konik said, as he pushed past the LWL's version of the Incredible Hulk.

"This is it?" Rye questioned, as they walked to the door, where they were greeted by a young woman who guided them in.

"Bonjour! I hope your travels were enjoyable. The mayor is very excited to see you both," she said in the slightest of Asian accents. The sign on the door read "mayor." She motioned for them to go in. "He is expecting you," she offered politely, with a slight bow.

Konik pushed the door open and was greeted by the smell of cigar and a really thick French accent. "HA! Mon ami! I did not think you would show up, no," Francois le'Chevalier spewed, jumping up from behind his massive oak desk and coming around to greet his guests. He walked directly to Rye and threw his arms around his massive friend, barely able to touch his hands together. Rye returned the embrace, almost squeezing the breath from the former LWL superstar. "Ahhh, and you," Francois said, switching his gaze to Konik. As FlC took a step nearer, Konik stuck out his hand, offering a handshake. "No way, mon ami. Not in my country," Francois snapped, pushing away his hand and wrapping his arms around his longtime partner. To add to his visual discomfort, FlC planted a kiss on Konik's cheek, who immediately pushed him away.

"Enough, already," the Polish superstar said in his gruff voice.

Strictly Business stood there reminiscing. It had been over a year since the three of them met at the LWL's biggest PPV. That was not a topic of conversation; as a matter of fact, wrestling didn't even come up. The LWL's most decorated six-man champions -- 14-time LWL World Six-man champs, 10-time LWL TV Six-man champs -- in a world dominated by Lone Wolves, they ended up an accidental powerhouse.

"How is retirement?" Konik asked.

"This is almost as fun as punching you in le face," Francois said through a smirk, taking a long drag from his cigar and exhaling slowly.

The door opened slowly and the young lady poked her head in shyly, offering, "They are ready for you, sir."

"Thanks, May," FlC replied.

"Is that May... as in May from the LWL front office?" Konik inquired. Francois smiled and shrugged, took a drag from his cigar, and walked out the door. As Strictly Business walked down the hall, they passed a sign that read "ceremonie de couronnement" in bold letters.

"Well, let's get you sworn in, Mr. Mayor," Rye said.

Francois adjusted his suit jacket, took a deep, smoke-free breath, and walked out to the yard, where a small crowd awaited him. No entry music. No pyrotechnics. Just a guy starting a new job with some old friends there to support him.

Calvin Harrell of Tennessee

YETI: The Thing (SHL) 1,014-152-16, $1,803,100 *12

 

WORLD, U.S., KING OF THE RING

World Champion

BURN: Mighty Schmitty (AWL)
Terrance Haggard of Illinois; 501; $300,000 + 100 free matches or a real wrestling belt & 50 free matches

Standing in the middle of an American Wrestling League ring, IWA manager Terrance Haggard is grinning from ear to ear. Behind him are Mighty Schmitty and the Jazzman. Terrance asks the crowd, "Who's THEE MOST MIGHTIEST OF THEM ALL?! It's Mighty Schmitty, of course!!! (Jazzman plays a brief tune on his saxophone.) Go ahead, Schmitty, show everyone your accolades!" Over Schmitty's right shoulder is the AWL Hardcore title, over his left shoulder is the IWA American Championship, and around his waist is the most prized accolade of them all, the IWA WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP!

"For those of you who may not know, Mighty Schmitty began his career in the most illustrious league at that time, the Mid-Atlantic Region League. He had a pretty good run there, but NOTHING beats this! Mighty Schmitty has now reached the level of immortality! And, Jazzman, show them what you have! (Jazzman raises the IWA United States Championship up high.) Good job, pal! Nobody will be shoving a saxophone up... eh, I can't say that here.

"Anyhow, I would like to dedicate these wins to my biggest supporters. IMT, this one's for you! Also, Lee Macko... this one's for you too, buddy! Without your reign of tyranny, we wouldn't be the best that we are today. Thank you, everybody, good night, and we love each and every one of you!"

U.S. Champion

TJH INC: Jazzman (AWL)
Terrance Haggard; 499; $60,000 + a plaque or 25 free matches; edged ArGr: Ariana's Award -- iHeartRadio #1 (LSL), IMT: Wayne "The Train" Robinson (STL), E$T/NJPW: "Time Bomb" Hiromu Takahashi (GGL)

King of the Ring

LTD: Dopey the Psycho Clown (DXL)
Cody Walker of Maryland; 500; a plaque or 25 free matches; 275 KotR total; hold positions were 1, 4, 6, 9, 10, 11, 12, 15; battle royal hold positions were 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9, 13, 14

 

SPECIALTY TITLES -- $25,000 + 10 free matches

American Champion

BURN: Mighty Schmitty (AWL)
Terrance Haggard of Illinois; 501

Asiatic Champion

Tenbatsu (UNL)
Tom Cottrill of Ohio; 500; edged LTD: Dopey the Psycho Clown (DXL)

Hardcore Champion

VIRUS: Scissors (CZL)
Jerry Martin of Indiana; 501

Metropolitan Champion

EDGE/ROT: Big Rye (LWL)
Rich Reilly of New Jersey; 15 free matches; edged VIRUS: Half Full (XPL)

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS -- $40,000 + 25 free matches

Iron Federation Champion

ARMY/IMT: "Jailbird" Marlon Porter (QPL)
Donald Henry of Illinois

Steel Federation Champion

BURN: Mighty Schmitty (AWL)
Terrance Haggard of Illinois; 501

Gold Federation Champion

IMT/AR15: Make America Great Again (NDL)
Kevin Elrod of Ohio; edged IMT: The Rock (TTL)

Diamond Federation Champion

IMT/LPPF: Magnificent Mike Eaves (LBL)
Michael Eaves of Mississippi; 499

Bronze Federation Champion

VIRUS: Chlamydia (SWL)
Frank Jay Belcher III of Michigan; 500; edged Tenbatsu (UNL)

Jade Federation Champion

EDGE: Brutal Mitchell (WEL)
Joshua Haight of Wisconsin; 501; edged VIRUS: Scissors (CZL)

 

NATIONAL, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS -- $20,000

National Champion

VIRUS: "Ice Cold" JD (YJL)
John Davis of Tennessee; 501; a plaque or 25 free matches; Atlantic region

Central Champion

VIRUS/AI: Awesome Adam Diamond (GRL)
Mitchell Morrissey of Missouri; 500

Dixie Champion

ArGr: "Enlightened" Ariana Grande (RCL)
Matt Yunick of New York; 500; edged VIRUS: Vicious Victor Oladipo (HRL)

Eastern Champion

IMT/ARMY: Geriatric Jeremy (MML)
Jeff Chambers of Iowa; 501; edged ArGr: "Never Pregnant" Ariana Grande (MUL), EDGE: tagodactyl (JDL)

Mountain Champion

APO: Untouchable #1 (AWL)
Kevin Perry of New Jersey; 499

Northern Champion

IMT: Angrycat Rick Wackson (SWL)
"The Game" from Parts Unknown; 499; edged EDGE: Guantanamo Inmate (JDL)

Pacific Champion

GTA/EO: "The Natural" Bobby Hamlin (AWL)
Erik G. Bugg of Virginia; 499

Prairie Champion

EDGE/H25: Southern Champ Mike Cook (APL)
Michael Cook of Kentucky; 499; edged VIRUS: "Driving Force" JD (YJL)

Southern Champion

IMT: The Arabian Giant (SWL)
"The Game"; 500; edged EDGE: Thor Hulkson (AEL), E$T/NJPW: "Cold Skull" Seiya Sanada (GGL)

Western Champion

EDGE: Kenni Koward (XPL)
Andrew Konik of Michigan; 500

 

LADIES' TITLES

Ladies' World Champion

EDGE/HYDRA: Dreamgirl Dana Powers (VVL)
"The Immortal" Shareef Johnson of New Jersey; $40,000 + a plaque or 15 free matches; edged LPPF/BOD: Kharma Kong (VUL), VIRUS/VD: Sasser (FFL), VIRUS/VD: Mississippi Hippie (LLL)

Ladies' U.S. Champion

LPPF/BOD: Diva Licious (VUL)
Keith A. Maple of Ohio; $20,000

Queen of the Ring

Diva Licious
270 QotR total

Ladies' National Champion

VIRUS: Car Trash Ian #6 (LLL)
Derek Tuttle of Florida; manager retained title; 501

Ladies' Tag-team Champions

KDSN: Jealous Sisters Kourtney & Kimberly Kardashian (FFL)
Matt Yunick of New York; 516

Ladies' U.S. Tag-team Champions

VIRUS/VD: Princess Anna & VIRUS: Miss Chievous (MDL)
Frank Jay Belcher III & Randall Angel from the Republic of Texas; edged VIRUS/FOE: Masked Madam #5 & VIRUS/VD: Mrs. Feng (FFL)

World Six-woman Champions

VIRUS/BOD: Snake Charmer, VIRUS: Hot Pocket, Bloodshed Brawler Betty (VUL)
Frank Jay Belcher III, Mitchell Johnson, both of Michigan, Michael Drake of New Jersey; 521

U.S. Six-woman Champions

VIRUS/BOD: Pandora's Box, VIRUS: Pink Panther, Brain Buster Babe (VUL)
Frank Jay Belcher III, Mitchell Johnson, Michael Drake; Belcher held titles 6 cycles in a row, Drake 3 in a row; 521

 

TAG-TEAM TITLES

World Tag-team Champions

EDGE: Iron Man & Gene's Tag Factory Worker #11 (QPL)
Joshua Haight of Wisconsin & Michael Cook of Kentucky; Cook held titles 8 cycles in a row, Haight retained titles; share of $50,000 + 15 free matches

EDGE: Cochise & IMT/ARMY: Pull My Finger (HWL)
Eugene Quintana of California & Jerry Anderson of Michigan

IMT/ARMY: Moldy Pistachio & IMT: Gerald "The Enforcer" Robinson (MEL)
Robbie "Blood" Pawelek of Texas & Gerald Robinson of Tennessee; Pawelek held titles 3 cycles in a row

Top Contenders

4. VIRUS: Gem & Trent Sven (EEL)
VIRUS/FOE: Masked Messiah #1 & VIRUS: Buster Blood (CSL)
VIRUS/COH: Roderick Rampage & Mike Vendetta (GNL)

7. EDGE/ROT: Future Nobody & EDGE: TML Kadri (HLL)

8. IMT/LPPF: Becker & IMT/SUPER*: Brutal Barry Stryker (PKL)
IMT/???: Bruiser Brett Brown & IMT/LPPF: Jim Whiskey (BRL)

10. Wild Card Garrett Shadowstar & The Tyrant David Hammerhead (CWL)

11. IMT: Big Blanks #3 & #4 (IWL)
last of the teams with 516

U.S. Tag-team Champions

EDGE: Stone Cold & Factory Owner Gene Winsalot (QPL)
Joshua Haight & Michael Cook; Cook held titles 8 cycles in a row, Haight retained titles; share of $20,000

IMT: Gerald "The Magnificent" Robinson & IMT/ARMY: Masked Intruder #1 (MEL)
Gerald Robinson & Robbie Pawelek; Pawelek held titles 3 cycles in a row; 516; edged VIRUS/CTI: Nick Jackson & VIRUS: Mr. Rogers (HWL), VIRUS: Walker #3 & Jimmy Havok (HLL)

 

SIX-MAN TITLES

World Six-man Champions

IMT/ARMY: Destrophy, "KOTR Champ" Jeff Chambers, Jer Bear #4 (TGL)
Jeff Chambers of Iowa & Jerry Anderson of Michigan (Bear); Chambers held titles 22 cycles in a row, Anderson 20 in a row; share of $50,000 + 15 free matches

IMT: Rabbit, Jeff Jarrett, IMT/ARMY: Smuggler Blood (IML)
"The Game" from Parts Unknown, Gerald Robinson of Tennessee, Robbie "Blood" Pawelek of Texas; Pawelek held titles 10 cycles in a row, "The Game" & Robinson 4 in a row

ARMY/IMT: "La Guera Loca" Eva Santhiago, "El Chapo" Felix Beltran, "El Sicario" Oscar Leyva (AAL)
Donald Henry of Illinois; manager held titles 4 cycles in a row

EDGE: Poutine Sasquatch, Gene's Tag Factory Worker #21, EDGE/ROT: Tres (OSL)
Jamie Davis, Michael Cook, both of Kentucky, Rich Reilly of New Jersey; Cook held titles 10 cycles in a row, Reilly 6 in a row, Davis retained titles

VIRUS: Botulism, Matt Jackson, Kenny Omega (HLL)
Frank Jay Belcher III of Michigan (Botulism) & Michael Drake of New Jersey; Belcher held titles 10 cycles in a row, Drake 5 in a row

VIRUS: Starfire, Hognose Snakeflu, KD Jabroni (EEL)
Randall Angel from the Republic of Texas & Michael Drake (Jabroni); Angel held titles 8 cycles in a row

VIRUS/FOE: Masked Menaces #4, #5, #6 (NDL)
Chris Miler of Michigan; manager held titles 3 cycles in a row

VIRUS: Brodie McDonald, Angus O'Grady, Rodrick O'Darby (ASL)
John Davis of Tennessee

ArGr: Astronaut Ariana Grande, Ariana's Pal Katy Perry, Friend Lea Michele (HWL)
LATIN: Senoritas Elena H., Stephanie T., Demi D. (CSL)
Matt Yunick of New York; manager retained titles

Top Contenders

11. IMT/ARMY: Corey Graves' Ugly Hair, Magnificent Miguel Cabrera, Big Time Brian Powell (AOL)

12. VIRUS: Murder Machines IV, V, VI (TDL)

13. VIRUS/FOE: Masked Marauders #7, #8, #9 (PKL)
VIRUS: Typhoid, Lassa, Dengue Fevers (MML)
last of the teams with 521

U.S. Six-man Champions

IMT/ARMY: Durz Golbag, Mystery Wrestler #5, Luchador Blood #6 (MML)
Jeff Chambers, Jerry Anderson, Robbie Pawelek; Chambers & Pawelek held titles 10 cycles in a row, Anderson 6 in a row; share of $20,000

IMT: Ursula, Jerry Jarrett, IMT/ARMY: Masked Blood #100 (IML)
"The Game," Gerald Robinson, Robbie Pawelek; "The Game" & Robinson held titles 4 cycles in a row

ArGr: Materialistic Ariana Grande, Ariana's Vid "The Light is Coming," Live -- Summer Sonic 2015 (TDL)
Matt Yunick; manager retained titles

VIRUS: Jimmy Havok, Gravy, Starvin' Marvin (HWL)
Michael Drake (Havok) & Frank Jay Belcher III; managers retained titles

EDGE/ROT: Skillz, Super Rye, EDGE: Fighting Spirits (OSL)
Rich Reilly & Michael Cook (Spirits)

EDGE/ROT: Seven 11, EDGE/H25: EDGE Alumni #4, EDGE: Big 5'9" (TTL)
Rich Reilly, Michael Cook, Jamie Davis; 521

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

1. BRL (1,351 matches) 490.864

2. NWL (912 matches) 462.927

3. UWL (892 matches) 490.636

4. LNL (789 matches) 490.958
won the two matches for $1 cycle for having the highest average strategy total (counting only active wrestlers)

5. LWL (781 matches) 490.000

6. XPL (584 matches) 490.806

7. QPL (582 matches) 467.950

8. IWL (560 matches) 490.426

9. HRL (519 matches) 490.604

10. HWL (492 matches) 490.870

 

TOP 20 MONEY HOLDERS -- active wrestlers only

1. Kaptain Kryptonite (NBL) $39,378,700

2. VIRUS: Mike Drake (HWL) $27,992,700

3. LPPF: Medieval Tymes (GRL) $26,087,100

4. Arsenal (PGL) $23,169,800

5. LPPF/IG: Misfit Messiah (BRL) $18,042,400

6. IMT/DoD: Sir Gunther Kinderwacht (BRL) $17,366,200

7. DFI: American Freedom Fighter E.J. (SHL) $17,064,938

8. VIRUS: Cpl. Punishment (LBL) $14,426,900

9. NGAA: Hawkeye Science (HLL) $13,582,100

10. Dan the Man (HSL) $11,912,100

11. NGAA: Rydia Stormer (MDL) $11,820,000

12. Death Warrant (CWL) $10,728,900

13. IMT/VS: Wonderful Wally Brown (GRL) $10,377,700

14. "Mr. Everything" Kirk Lockran (AWL) $9,669,900

15. MWC: Pete the Geek (IGL) $9,632,100

16. MWC: "Mr. Minnesota" Olaf Gustavson (QPL) $9,249,700

17. SHS: "Money-Driven" Mike Sebastian (BRL) $9,097,900

18. VIRUS/AI: Johnny Slaughter (GRL) $8,820,600

19. VIRUS: F.B. III (KKL) $8,148,400

20. RIZE: Vitamin Z (AAL) $8,068,400

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

Iron Federation

Center Stage, Extreme Existence, Generation Next, Hardcore Wrestling, Heroes and Legends, Iron Man, Main Event, Quantum Pro, Unknown Wrestler, Vixens United, Xtreme Poison, Yellow Jacket

Steel Federation

American Wrestling, Classic Championship Wrestling, Intense Impact, King of Kings, Louisiana Purchase, Louisiana Swamp, Man Up, New Blood, Old School, Vicious Valkyries, Wild Panthers, World Domination

Gold Federation

All Star, Battle Royal, Blood Bath, Continental Wrestling, Global Wrestling, Independent Wrestling, Knight's Honor, Masked Mayhem, Mystic Diva, New Wave, Ninja Dojo, Snake Venom, Texas Death, Triple Threat

Diamond Federation

Action Packed, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Lethal Brawling, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Non-stop Action, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla, Rajun Cajun, Saber Tooth, Xtreme Wrestling

Bronze Federation

American Extreme, American Outlaw, Extreme Hardcore, Grim Reaper, Hardcore Superstars, High Rollers, Iron Glove, Living Nightmare, Revolution Wrestling, Rogue Elephant, Strong Style Wrestling, United Nations

Jade Federation

Atomic Age, Combat Zone, Deluxe Wrestling, Growling Grizzly, Jade Dragon, Lone Wolf, Lovely Ladies, Psychotic Killer, Super Hero, True Grit, Wrestlers Elite

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