IWA REPORT
Vol. 14, No. 10 -- August 2009
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WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION

Persuasive Pat Patterson, drawn by Cody SchibiACE: Persuasive Pat Patterson (KKL) finessed his way to the game's top prize of $300,000 in imaginary money with his perfect 501-pointer! His manager, Howie Sandberg of New York, can now decide if he wants 100 free matches or a real wrestling belt and 50 free matches.

 

U.S. CHAMPION

"Too Dope for VH1" BossCat Empson of Virginia managed his wrestler, PAIN: Rock ROLL (LBL), to the U.S. Championship, making it four U.S. titles for B.C. Empson! COT: Skater Punk Mosh (IGL), ACE: Atomic Punk (NGL), and WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (GRL) also had 500 points, but lost by point flow.

 

KING OF THE RING

Jonathan Akers of Texas won this title for a fourth consecutive cycle! His wrestler again had an unbeatable 274 points when we added up the values of hold positions 1, 3, 6, 7, 10, 12, 13, and 14 in each battle royal winner's strategy. This time it was (: Slash Craven (RCL) who won him the engraved plaque or 25 free matches. Slash was entered in the running for this title because we neglected to enter him in his league's battle royal, which he would have won. Had it not been for this, the title would have gone to 4REICH: Sack Master LaMarr Woodley (MEL), managed by Keith A. Maple of Ohio, who had 500 total points and 272 King of the Ring points. EDGE/NME: Cobra Commander (MWL) had the same KOTR score as LaMarr, but a lesser overall strategy. The league battle royals were decided using hold positions 2, 4, 5, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 15.

 

AMERICAN CHAMPION

These 10 free matches went to NME/NSL/UA: Mad Dog Tim Zaegel (OSL) of Virginia, who had a strategy total of 500 points! (IWA veterans may recognize the NME stable initials, but this version stands for, simply, "Enemy." The original NME initials stood for "New Mark of Excellence.")

 

ASIATIC CHAMPION

NME: Dominant Factor Fury (CFL) grabbed this $25,000 purse and its accompanying 10 free matches for manager Tim Zaegel of Virginia! 4REICH: "Caged Xplosion" Andrei Arlovski (JDL) also had a 500 total, but lost by point flow.

Next cycle, the NBL will be replacing the PML as our Asiatic league in the Steel Federation.

 

HARDCORE CHAMPION

Tony Pesante of New York coached (: "The Crippler" Chris Savage (HWL) to point flow victory over EDGE/NME: Vlad Dracul (GRL) in the battle for this title! He wins 10 free matches for his troubles. Both wrestlers had 500 points.

 

METROPOLITAN CHAMPION

These 10 free matches went home with Chad LaBombard of Michigan, who led NME: "The Thriller" Ric Heller (NBL) to a win over both Jake "The Milkman" Milliman (MRL) and EDGE/NME: Vlad Dracul (GRL)! All three grapplers had a strategy worth 500 points.

 

CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION

BCC: Solo (JCL) went on the "Warpath" last cycle, and prevailed over the champions of our other rookie leagues. He received $25,000 in imaginary earnings, and his manager, Mansa McQueen of Maryland, won 10 free matches!

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS

ACE: Sheik Abdul Assad (NGL) edged out NME: Poison (SML) to win the Iron Federation's 25 free matches for John M. Kruse of Indiana. Both had 501 points. Pat Patterson swapped his Steel Federation belt for the World Heavyweight Championship. Howie Sandberg of New York also claimed the Diamond Federation title! His wrestler, ACE: "Magnificent" Martin Brodeur (RCL), had a perfect 501 total. Receiving the Gold Federation's $40,000 prize was EDGE/NME: IWA's Number 1 Talent (MWL), who belongs to Steven J. Deane of Nebraska. ACE: The Textbook Technician (MPL) and (: 40 oz Renegade Johnny Mustang (NDL) also had 499 points, but were edged out. In the Bronze Federation, Tim Zaegel of Virginia coached NME: Dominant Factor Fury (CFL) to the top of the heap, which consisted of EDGE/NME: Vlad Dracul (GRL), ACE: The Legendary One (BWL), WWW: Arson (IGL), ACE: The Soultaker (WCL), and FOE: Greatest Criminal Mind Lex "CS" Luthor (MSL). Each wrestler had a 500-pointer. The Jade Federation champion was 4REICH: "Caged Xplosion" Andrei Arlovski (JDL)! Keith A. Maple of Ohio armed him with a 500 total.

 

NATIONAL CHAMPION, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS

After edging out ACE: Gavin MacLeod (NDL) and EDGE/NME: Rogue Warrior: Talon (ASL) to claim the Mountain region, NME: "The Craze" Chris Genovicci (MSL) used his unstoppable 501-point strategy to gain the National prize of an engraved plaque or 25 free matches for Chad LaBombard of Michigan! Taking the remaining titles were...

Atlantic: WWW: Sadistic Sean Danger (NSL)
owned by Shaun Sims of Maryland; scored a perfect 501 total
Central: COT: "Wrestling Demon" Alcohol (GRL)
managed to a 501 by Michael Cook of Kentucky
Dixie: EDGE/NME: Storm Shadow (MWL)
wrestles for Steven J. Deane of Nebraska; edged HIGHER FLYERS: "Jumpin" Jim Brazil (MRL), (: Mr. Hyde (RYL), ACE: Awesome Force (BWL), (: Slow Moving Carabao (MEL), and ACE: Mr. Hardcore (GRL), all with 500
Eastern: EDGE/NME: Rogue Warrior: Eagle Claw (ASL)
also owned by Steven J. Deane; had 501 points
Northern: 4REICH: Sack Master LaMarr Woodley (MEL)
managed by Keith A. Maple of Ohio; edged out (: Legendary Spoiler #4 (HWL) and ACE: "The Crazy Cybog" Kevin Franklin (DDL), all with 500
Pacific: Bandit (RBL)
won the $20,000 prize for Burt Reynolds of Alabama; had to use point flow to defeat COT/DOC: Dr. TNT Ronnie Jax (GRL), 4REICH: Sack Master James Harrison (MEL), (: Jonny Vegas (SAL), and NME: Electric Eric Embers (NBL), all with 500 points
Prairie: (: The Lethal Little Guy (ECL)
managed by Tony Pesante of New York; edged 4REICH: The Hillside Strangler #2 (ASL), (: Edgar "The Snail" Hevle (MBL), and 4REICH: "The Big Mo" Anthony Dudick (NSL), all with 500
Southern: EDGE/NME: "Precious" Sol Hellering (ASL)
chalked up another win for Steven J. Deane; scored a perfect 501
Western: (: Dark Angel (NBL)
owned by Scott K. Olson of Nevada; had to edge out NME members Stunning Steve Sawyer (MSL) and Dominant Factor Anarchy (OTL), all with 500

 

LADIES' TITLES

4REICH: Michelle "The Invisible Woman" Yeoh (MDL) won the Ladies' World title, and gave Anthony Dudick of New York a second straight engraved plaque or 15 free matches! LB: L.A. Mazzaratti (VVL) again missed out on this title due to point flow. Michelle teamed with "The Machine Girl" Minase Yashiro, and the pair ended up with the World Tag-team straps. Anthony also secured the Queen of the Ring honors, thanks to 4REICH: Anita "Wonder Woman" Mui (MDL), who had 500 points, and then he watched her retain the U.S. tag titles with Maggie "Thief Catcher" Cheung! Frank Snow of North Carolina led LB: Lotus the Ninja Girl (VVL) to the $20,000 Ladies' U.S. Championship. The World Six-woman champions were NME: Carol the Bar Maid, Drunk Debbie Stevens, and Tipsy Tammy Stevens (VVL), who belong to Chad LaBombard of Michigan. Tammy went home with the Ladies' National title after edging out Carol! Anita Mui also had 500 points, but lost by point flow. NME: "Sizzling" Cheri Summers, "Vivacious" Valerie Phoenix, and "Sweetness" Stacy Warner (FFL) kept Tim Zaegel of Virginia's name on the U.S. Six-woman belts!

 

WORLD TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

These $50,000 titles were awarded to (: Don Flamenco and Soda Popinski (MBL)! Their manager, Nitsuj Arep from the Land of Mirrors, can now choose either an engraved plaque or 15 free matches. All 10 teams in the standings had 516 points!

 

TOP 10 TAG-TEAMS

1. (: Don Flamenco & Soda Popinski (MBL)
2. EDGE: The Feature Freddy & Flawless Floyd Flamingo (RYL)
3. "Rey Rey" Simmons & "Hacksaw" Bane Bradshaw (MRL)
4. RWS/MCM: Bio-Hazard & Jason "The Love Slave" (ZPL)
5. ACE: Hitman's Wrath & "The Original ACE****" Howie Sandberg (MPL)
ACE: "High Roller" Hank Richards & "Pimp Daddy" Paulie Lang (BBL)
7. (: Ox Cutter & Seniram Eht Nioj (XPL)
8. EDGE: Millennium & the Xecutioner (MIL)
9. (: Matti & Buck Vegas (SAL)
10. FOE: The Game MC & "Money" Mike Carver (GRL)

 

U.S. TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

EDGE/NME: Rogue Warriors: Eagle Claw and Talon (ASL) won these belts for Steven J. Deane of Nebraska! They had to use point flow to overpower the American Dream Dusty Roads and Dos Dragones (NDL); ACE: Locked Up Larry and Mr. Excellent (ZPL); plus ILL: Prince of Perfection and Flash Dance Fernandez (QPL). Each team had a perfect 516 total!

 

WORLD SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Seven teams had to share these titles last time. Howie Sandberg kept his name on the belts for a third straight cycle with the help of his WSL team! The MEL trio belongs to Mike Dorsett, and the XPL crew is owned by Anthony Dudick, who was the third and final manager representing the state of New York in six-man action. Jonathan Akers of Texas led his CSL wrestlers to victory, while "The Smooth One" Jeff Manning of Ohio brought his EHL team to the party. The TCL winners are managed by Chad Burton of Indiana, and the HSL team is under contract to Brian B. of New Hampshire. All 10 teams listed had 521 points!

 

TOP 10 SIX-MAN TEAMS

1. ACE: "The X Factor" Xavier Magnum, "Don't Hate the Playa" Pete Pennington, "Big Daddy" Brandon Pennington (WSL)
EDGE: Classy Chris, Dangerous Derek, the Executioner Eric Domino (MEL)
(: Icepick, Pitchfork, Boxcutter (XPL)
(: Brian Chance, "Bad Blood" Tre Brown, "El Jefe" Oscar Morales (CSL)
(: Slick Vic Greed, Masked Inmate V.E.B., Mr. Stroke of Death (EHL)
FOE: Cracker Jack Black, the Landlord, the Tax Collector (TCL)
VNV: Neal "The Jazz Man" Sax, Captain Blue, "Darling" Dean Willis (HSL)
8. COT: Hellfire Tyrant MRP, Super Killer Devasto, Mr. ASL Diamondgrim the Powerful (ASL)
9. (: Bald Bull, Don Flamenco, Soda Popinski (MBL)
10. EDGE: Virus, Annihilator, EDGE/VIP: Reddogg (MIL)

 

U.S. SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

(: Jim the Butcher, Manslaughter Mark, and Irish Mickey Mulholland (RSL) fought valiantly for these $20,000 purses, and ended up taking them home! Scott K. Olson of Nevada helped them overcome ACE: "Heavenly" Harley, "Too Good" Tyler, and "Rugged" Randy Sanders (WSL); EDGE/NME: "Precious" Sol Hellering, and Rogue Warriors: Eagle Claw and Talon (ASL); plus SITH: Darth Ravage, Darth Avatar, and Darth Bedlam (NSL). Each team had a perfect score of 521 points!

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

The most active leagues for the July cycle, based on the number of matches, appear below. The All Star League remained in first place. Managers in the Grim Reaper League can take two matches for $1 next cycle, since their active wrestlers had the highest average strategy total! The MRL, NAL, and NBL rounded out the top four.

1. ASL (1,409 matches) 492.697
2. GRL (1,137 matches) 494.983
3. MRL (1,060 matches) 493.667
4. NBL (1,018 matches) 493.039
5. NAL (955 matches) 493.315
6. UEL (867 matches) 458.943
7. BOL (700 matches) 480.184
8. DDL (599 matches) 490.830
9. FLL (596 matches) 488.765
10. LLL (573 matches) 490.818

 

TOP 20 STARS

(Only active wrestlers were included on this list.)

1. WWW: Sinister Steve Stryker (CSL) 56
2. LPPF/RUNXT: Innovator of Arrogance Keith A. Maple (XPL) 52
3. SAMHAIN: Damien Deadsoul (ECL)
EDGE: The Terminator (KKL)
51
5. WWW: Buda Von Blitzen (MIL)
WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (CWL)
WWW: Nightmare Sam Hell (NDL)
49
8. EDGE: Chris Coldstone (JIL)
ACE: New Breed Destroyer (ASL)
48
10. ACE: Danni Ashe (FFL)
WWW: Lord of Illusions (JIL)
WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (QPL)
PAIN: Outlaw Tony Taylor (NFL)
47
14. COT: Duke Dangerous (ECL) 46
15. EDGE: Black Knight (IML)
EDGE/NME: Hooded Nightmare (OTL)
WWW: Wonderful Wally Brown (IGL)
45
18. 4REICH: Bloody Assault Jessica Lee Richards (LLL)
ACE: Danny S. Spivey (HML)
4REICH: Diesel Duddick (NSL)
4REICH: Medieval Tymes (GRL)
COT: Sammy Solar (OSL)
44

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

IRON FEDERATION: Center Stage, Extreme Action, Extreme Existence, Hardcore Wrestling, Iron Man, Murder Incorporated, Mysterious Benefactor, Next Generation, Quick Pin, Rising Stars, Slumber-party Massacre, Under Fire, Wrestling Superstars, Xtreme Poison

STEEL FEDERATION: Absolute Pain, Caribbean Coast, Devil Inside, Fighting Legends, Intense Impact, King Kong, Lost Souls, Mid-Atlantic Region, New Blood, Old School, Praying Mantis, Rebel Yell, Vicious Valkyries, Zeus Power

GOLD FEDERATION: All Star, Battle Royal, Black Ops, Blood Bath, Chicago Legends, Classic Wrestling, Dark Angel, Federated Suns, Hit Man, Majestic Property, Masked Wrestling, Mystic Diva, Ninja Dojo, Texas Death, Union Express

DIAMOND FEDERATION: American Bodyslam, American Legion, Armed Forces, Bounty Hunter, Dark Days, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Fractured Jaw, Last Breath, Lights Out, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Non-stop Action, Rajun Cajun, Xtreme Wrestling

BRONZE FEDERATION: Barbaric Warrior, Coffin Filler, Extreme Hardcore, Grim Reaper, Hot Streak, Iron Glove, Jersey City Wrestling, Main Event, Men of Steel, Old Timer's, Raging Bull, Soul Asylum, Torture Chamber, War Cry

JADE FEDERATION: Atomic Age, Iron Cross, Jade Dragon, Just Incredible, Just Rasslin', Killer Soldiers, Lovely Ladies, Psychotic Killer, Smoking Gun, South Central Wrestling, Super Hero, Thor's Hammer, World Wrestling, Wrestlers Elite

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