IWA REPORT
Vol. 11, No. 1 -- January 2006
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JOHNNY B SAYS

This cycle, Brandon "The Bull" Orndorff (1,020-202-51, $2,444,600) becomes the first wrestler from the Mid-Atlantic Region League to enter our Hall of Fame. He is managed by Michael Long of West Michigan, who is probably best known for having been one-half of Dee-Jay back in the early to mid-90's. Michael wanted to take this opportunity to thank the other half of Dee-Jay, Hector Serrano of New Jersey, as well as each and every MRL manager for making it arguably the best league in the history of the IWA. Finally, he sends a big THANK YOU to "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan, and all the other great personalities that made wrestling such a "wonderful" part of his life.

We have received numerous requests to open the previously delayed Gorgeous Amazon League, which now has an assigned commissioner. All new and transferred wrestlers next cycle will receive a free battle royal entree upon arrival to this new, Bronze Federation ladies' league. Use this opportunity to give your female grapplers some new competition!

The Unknown Wrestler League is back! Many of you remember how exciting the first round of this league was, and the second is sure to be even more intense. Check your bulletin for the details on this unique league, then sign up!

 

WORLD CHAMPION

Taking the IWA's top prize last cycle was the Almighty Grammar Man (PML), managed by Larry Akers of Ohio, who can now choose 100 free matches or a real wrestling belt and 50 free matches! His wrestler claimed the Steel Federation title with his 500-pointer, then edged the Jade champion for the win.

 

U.S. CHAMPION

SCA: Lenny Lane (KCL) defeated all of the TV champions in the IWA last cycle, gaining $60,000 for himself and the choice between an engraved plaque and 25 free matches for his manager, Tony Robinson of Florida! His strategy total was 500 points.

 

KING OF THE RING

Austin Hauger of Indiana won an engraved plaque or 25 free matches when we added up the values of hold positions 2, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, and 14 in the strategy of every battle royal winner. The 273 total for his wrestler, LPPF: The Bringer of Demoralizing Sorrow (JRL), was unbeatable! Nice work, Austin.

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS

The winner in the Iron Federation was SCA: Tony "The Legend Killer" Robinson (HTL), who manages himself out of Florida. He had to use point flow to beat UKA: "Mr. Minnesota" Olaf Gustavson (QPL), as both had a 499 total. Tony also manages the current Jade Federation champion, SCA: Walker "The Evil" Clown (KCL)! Walker had a strategy worth 500 points. The Steel Federation belt went to the Almighty Grammar Man, who later traded up to the World title. Defeating all others in the Gold Federation was Æ: Pentagon Priest (NDL), managed by Kevin Kolodiej of Maryland. SCA: Vitor "The Phenom" Belfort (HML) was edged for the title. Kevin also won the Diamond Federation championship! Æ: King Kong Kolodiej (JHL) was armed with a 499-pointer. Picking up a cool $40,000 in the Bronze Federation was JL6: Ke Awe Da Flyin Ha-Y-N (GBL). His manager, John Lala of California, earned 25 free matches by leading his man to victory over both TV: Minnesota Wrecking Crew III (IGL) and UKA: Joe Dirt (FTL). All three had 499 points. Congratulations, John!

 

NATIONAL CHAMPION, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS

Three wrestlers ended in an unbreakable tie for the National honors last time, and all three are managed by Steven M. Shotliff of Minnesota! He wins an engraved plaque or 25 free matches for coaching LBL: "The Hot Shot" Tommy Hott (HTL) to the Pacific title, plus Commissioner's Bodyguard (QPL) and UKA: The Rockin' Redneck (DZL) to a point flow victory over LPPF: Max Violence (MIL) for the Central region. All four wrestlers had 500 points! Picking up the remaining titles were...

Atlantic: NME: Jumpin Johnny Stargunn (QPL)
499 points
Dixie: COT: "Flesh Eater" Darron Benton (DIL)
edged both USD: "Grave Digger" Frankie Graves (HRL) and UKA: Assassin II (JIL)
Eastern: Æ: Ladon (BBL)
edged JL6: Halawa Neanderthal (IML), Æ: Heroic Homer Simpson (PTL), Æ: William Phillip (AAL), and USD: Unlimited (JIL)
Mountain: SCA: Darkness (KCL)
500 total
Northern: SCA/DEAD: Cosmic Invader (KCL)
499-pointer
Prairie: USD: Mean Mitch Page (JIL)
used point flow to win against Lashley (WWL)
Southern: NME: Rugged Ron Stargunn (QPL)
499 points
Western: USD: Ratas Man (KCL)
edged out MOTORHEADBANGER: Annihilator (JIL)

 

LADIES' TITLES

The Ladies' World Champion last time was SCA: Bad Girl Britney Sky (LLL), managed by Tony Robinson of Florida! Her 500-pointer earned Tony an engraved plaque or 15 free matches. Taking the Queen of the Ring honors was GR8: Lilly D (VVL), managed by Daniel Myers of Maryland. Daniel also won the Ladies' National Championship, using X/GR8: Lovely Miss (LLL)! She had to edge out stablemates Patricia Love (VVL), Jessica Worth (LLL), Misty Reigns (LLL), and last cycle's champion, SCA: Mary "The Mullet" (LLL), since all had 500 points. HELLS MINION: "The Lioness" Trish Stratus (VVL) added $20,000 to her bank account by winning the Ladies' U.S. title. She is managed by Francis Guy of Massachusetts. The U.S. Six-woman champions were NME: "Just Plain Sexy" Stephanie, "Amazingly Hot" Angela, and "Extremely Exotic" Kimberly Sweetheart (VVL), who are managed by "The Ladies' Man" Nick Dendekker of Canada. Nick also helped NME: Buffy and Missy the Vampires (VVL) hold onto their Ladies' Tag-team belts by edging SCA: Moody Maddie and Evil Erin (FFL)! They teamed with Stephy the Vampire and tried for the World Six-woman titles, but lost by point flow to CB: "Perfect Ten" Jen Carfagno, Christi "Got It All" Paul, and Rudi "Baby Got" Bakhtiar (FFL). W.P. Mills of Wisconsin manages all three. Showing the other TV tag champions how it's done were Jason P. Miller and Patrick Eakin (both hailing from Kansas). USD: Trailer Wench Agatha Terrible and Echo (VVL) grabbed the Ladies' U.S. Tag-team titles for their respective owners.

 

WORLD TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

Scott K. Olson of Arizona gained an engraved plaque or 15 free matches by managing Æ: Doomsayer and Dark Angel #2 (PML) to the top of all our league tag-teams last cycle. The top eight teams in the standings had 516 points!

 

TOP 10 TAG-TEAMS

1. Æ: Doomsayer & Dark Angel #2 (PML)
2. DC: Anguish & Agony (LWL)
3. USD: Precious Moments Squirrel & Bunny (AAL)
4. COT: Chaotic Karl & Crippler Chris Kovacs (JIL)
5. CD: Kael & Aeneas Bloodblade (MOL)
6. SCA: Tony "The Legend Killer" & Tony "The King of Pancrase" Robinson (HTL)
7. USD: Killer Kyle Broslovski & Satanic Stan Marsh (PTL)
8. USD: Michaelangelo & Donatello (NYL)
9. HELLS MINION: The Attraction & Show Stopper (TPL)
10. WWW: Ultramaim & Gutterspike (QPL)

 

U.S. TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

SCA: Diamond Dallas and DEE (NYL) each earned $20,000 in imaginary earnings last cycle by scoring a perfect 516, the best of any league TV tag-team champions. They are managed by Tony Robinson of Florida!

 

WORLD SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Seven teams must share these titles, as all had perfect team strategies! The WWW members in the standings belong to IWA veteran Mike Moore of North Carolina. Steve Young of Ohio owns Unlimited and Royal Flush, while Simon Sez is managed by John M. Kruse of Indiana. Andre Sabucco of Texas is the power behind Mr. Income Irvin Massacre, and his partners in crime are the property of C.J. Frank of California. Robb Routh of Virginia owns the contracts of the the LeBlancs. Jester, Viper, and Iceman, along with Heaven's Gate, Ego Trip, and Hell's Fire, plus Razor Ramone and Diesel all belong to Kevin Kolodiej of Maryland. "Handsome" Hulk Hogan (WWL) is managed by Scott Lowe of Missouri, who held these titles with Kevin Kolodiej last time! The top eight teams listed had 521 points. Tim Faucet, Sheriff Johnson, and Kefin Lee stayed on the list from last cycle, as did the Mulhollands of the YCL. Impressive!

 

TOP 10 SIX-MAN TEAMS

1. WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore, WWW/NFL: Hitman Scott Case, Quick-Kill Keith Brooking (QPL)
USD: Unlimited, Royal Flush, Simon Sez (JIL)
SCA: Mr. Income Irvin Massacre, Baby Ray, Don Dawson (BTL)
Æ: Diamondback Drew, Brutal Brett, Lethal Lance LeBlanc (GBL)
Æ: Jester, Viper, Iceman (NLL)
Æ: Heaven's Gate, Ego Trip, Hell's Fire (HRL)
Razor Ramone, Diesel, "Handsome" Hulk Hogan (WWL)
8. Æ: Tim Faucet, Sheriff Johnson, Kefin Lee (RHL)
9. Æ: Jim the Butcher, Manslaughter Mark, Irish Mickey Mulholland (YCL)
Æ: Doomsayer, Dark Angel, Dark Angel #2 (PML)

 

U.S. SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Awarded $20,000 apiece for these titles were WWW: The Burger King, Lord Stanley, and Vector Sigma (HRL)! James Steen of Florida managed them to a win over Æ: Jon Quakers, Merit Goose Mon, and Kevlin Hawg (RHL), who also had a perfect 521 total. Good job, James!

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

The most active leagues for the Holidays cycle are listed below, in order of the number of matches. Also shown is the average strategy total for each league, counting only active wrestlers. Since it had the highest average, managers in the LLL get two matches for $1 next cycle!

1. FJL (946 matches) 461.178
2. ASL (897 matches) 488.239
3. HTL (778 matches) 492.729
4. LLL (657 matches) 493.192
5. MRL (648 matches) 489.810
6. AEL (620 matches) 489.247
7. IGL (555 matches) 486.980
8. JIL (546 matches) 491.924
9. KKL (512 matches) 473.186
10. DIL (511 matches) 486.375

 

TOP 20 MONEY HOLDERS

1. IIEII: Izzy Stradlin (RHL) $16,774,100
2. Æ: Darian Tomb (ASL) $16,657,200
3. COT: The Survivor (HAL) $10,485,300
4. DFI: American Freedom Fighter E.J. (SHL) $10,159,438
5. WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (QPL) $10,149,200
6. LPPF: King Krusher (WAL) $9,571,900
7. JL6: The Hooded Inmate (IML) $7,906,600
8. "Mr. Powerful" Ken Lambeau (PKL) $7,474,700
9. WYD: Super Stud Biff Backhand (ASL) $6,793,800
10. DC: Diesel Duddick (NSL) $6,593,300
11. NVUS: Macho Man Daniel Savage (CFL) $6,575,900
12. CORE: Johnny Cage (OGL) $6,570,038
13. PAIN: Manitou (AAL) $6,468,500
14. CORE: Snake Badlands (OGL) $6,456,645
15. PAIN: Cougar - WK (AAL) $6,393,300
16. CORE: Deacon Frost (OGL) $6,323,000
17. IE: Sister of Night (LLL) $6,191,800
18. TD: General Johnny Contract (JIL) $6,064,800
19. CD: Aeneas Bloodblade (MOL) $5,868,800
20. CD: Kael Bloodblade (MOL) $5,821,800

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

IRON FEDERATION: Battling Titans, Danger Zone, Heart Throb, Iron Man, Lethal Weapon, Mount Olympus, Murder Incorporated, Northern Lights, Quick Pin, Under Fire

STEEL FEDERATION: Caribbean Coast, Devil Inside, Fight Night, Hired Assassin, Intense Impact, King Kong, Mid-Atlantic Region, Praying Mantis, Red Hot, Sterling Silver, True Grit, Vicious Valkyries

GOLD FEDERATION: All Star, Battle Royal, Blood Bath, Chicago Legends, Classic Wrestling, Eastern Stars, Gold Digger, Hit Man, Living Nightmare, Ninja Dojo, Olympic Gold, San Francisco, Texas Death

DIAMOND FEDERATION: Arm Lock, Axe Blade, Chaotic Rebellion, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Fractured Jaw, Jack Hammer, Last Breath, Lights Out, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Wild Kingdom

BRONZE FEDERATION: Alter Ego, Coffin Filler, Famous Talent, Glory Bound, Grim Reaper, Iron Glove, Mat Action, Mat Mayhem, New York, Trouble Maker, Wild America, World Championship

JADE FEDERATION: Atomic Age, High Rollers, Jade Dragon, Jolly Roger, Just Incredible, Kings Court, Lovely Ladies, Prime Time, Psychotic Killer, Super Hero, Total Package, World Wrestling

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