IWA REPORT
Vol. 10, No. 12 -- Dog Days 2005
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JOHNNY B SAYS

We have finally unmasked the winner of the Unknown Wrestler League! SC: High Stakes Chris Edwards, who hails from the CFL, outlasted the competition to gain a real-life engraved championship belt and 25 free matches for his manager, Ed Cassens of Missouri. A hearty congratulations to Ed on this accomplishment. Thanks to everyone who participated and made this special league so much fun!

Bubba "The Butcher" Johnson of Mississippi is entering seven of his STUD/DEAD wrestlers in our Hall of Fame this cycle. From the MIL are Blue Eyes Ultima Dragon (1,219-111-43, $5,614,200 *23), Flaming Swordsman (1,034-99-23, $1,541,100 *6), Dark Magician (1,043-123-26, $5,248,500 *17), and King Tarzan (1,277-487-100, $4,840,500 *24). Both the Serpent (1,345-550-97, $5,022,800 *24) and Mr. Clean (1,045-330-65, $2,622,300 *20) ended their careers in the NLL, and the DZL was home to King Butcher (1,275-496-95, $4,644,800 *22). Bubba will receive an engraved plaque for each of these successful grapplers!

On a related note, "The Ultimate Commodity" Tony Volpe has been un-inducted from our Hall. Last cycle, a manager set up a fake email account and pretended to be Tony, asking that we retire his wrestler. Because of this, we can no longer accept Hall of Fame submissions by email or fax -- you must use snail mail. Letters we receive through the Post Office contain postmarks which indicate where they originated, and allow us to use other methods to verify that you are who you claim to be (comparing handwriting, for example). We're certainly not happy about inconveniencing every, single manager because of the actions of one person. This change will be inconvenient for us, as well, but we don't want something like this to occur again.

 

WORLD CHAMPION

Tony Robinson of Florida came up with a perfect 501-point strategy last cycle, and he gave it to CTI: Tony Ceno (SSL). First Ceno used it to win the Steel Federation title, then he traded up to the World prize of a real wrestling belt and 50 free matches or 100 free matches!

 

U.S. CHAMPION

Henry Boegle of New York can choose between a large, engraved plaque and 25 free matches, since BOC: Louisiana Wildfire (WKL)'s 500-point strategy was the best out of all our league TV champions. Edged for this title were NVUS: Homeless Bum (LOL), NVUS: Crypt (LBL), and PA: Mississippi Marauder (NFL).

 

KING OF THE RING

Agent of Freedom (NSL) obtained a large, engraved plaque or 25 free matches for his manager, Eric Jones of Maryland, by scoring 273 points in this free-for-all. (We added the values of hold positions 3, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, 13, and 14 in every league battle royal winner's strategy to determine the winner.) If you add up all 15 of his holds, you get a total of 500!

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS

Anthony Mattera of Rhode Island worked his magic on IIEII: Skull Dragon (NLL), leading him to the Iron Federation title! His strategy total was 499. Current IWA World Champion Tony Ceno ruled the Steel Federation with his perfect 501 before moving up to the World honors. In the Gold, the Living Legend Frank Leatherman Snow (BRL) of North Carolina won the 25 free matches. DHM: Charles "Canadian Warrior" Blackheart (CRL), managed by Charles Carley of Missouri, used point flow to win the tough battle for the Diamond Federation strap. He edged out King of the Ring Agent of Freedom (NSL), DC: BuRnOuT (WKL), NVUS: Dirty Bum (LOL), NVUS: Chaos (LBL), and SC: Wildcard Ace Hunter (NFL). All six men had 500 points! Taking the Bronze Federation was DC: Death Threat (WCL). Eric Dudick of New York coached him to a point flow victory over NVUS: Kilo (TML). The Jade Federation champion was CTI: The Male Gigolo (AAL). His manager is IWA veteran Joshua Haight of Wisconsin.

 

NATIONAL CHAMPION, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS

Kevin Hurley of Canada wasn't just whistling Dixie as he watched EDGE: Martin Q. Blank (ECL) use a 500-pointer to gain him either a large, engraved plaque or 25 free matches. Finding themselves EDGEd for the Dixie regional play-off were BOC: Larry "The Lunatic" Merrill (WKL) and FTW: Rufus, the Good Time Cowboy (LBL). The rest of the regions went to...

Atlantic: UKA: 3 Midgets in a trenchcoat (CRL)
edged DHM: "FSL Owner" Nick Dendekker (NFL) and UKA: Knuckledragger (LBL), all with 500
Central: WWW: The Great Makoto (ECL)
edged out xXx: Public NME #1 (WKL), both with 500
Eastern: xXx: Public NME #2 (WKL)
500-pointer
Mountain: xXx: Public NME #3 (WKL)
edged out DTP: Cracker Jack Black (LOL), both with 500
Northern: DC: Hysteria (WKL)
499 points
Pacific: xXx: Public NME #10 (WKL)
500 total
Prairie: BOC: Sammy "The Tickler" Jones (WKL)
500-point strategy
Southern: xXx: Public NME #4 (WKL)
500 points
Western: WWW: Yokosuka Matsumoto (ECL)
499 total

 

LADIES' TITLES

Don Szurka of Wisconsin conquered the Ladies' World Championship with Fat Sweaty Betty (FFL). Her 500-pointer earned him an engraved plaque or 15 free matches! Don also won the Ladies' U.S. championship, since Xtra Large Marge (FFL)'s strategy weighed in at 500 points. MWC: Brandy Dirt (FFL) gained the Queen of the Ring crown for Steven M. Shotliff of Minnesota. Taking the National title with a 500 total was NVUS: "Terrible" Tangela Hawkins (FFL). She's managed by Anthony Rodriguez of Alabama. The Ladies' tag belts went to UKA: Sharifa and Jessiqua (VVL), managed by Scott K. Olson of Arizona. They defeated NVUS: Erica Everest and Melody Foxxe (WUL) by point flow. The Ladies' U.S. Tag-team champions were NME: "Da Brat" C.J. Thomas and Sexy Kima Thomas (FFL), managed by "Rotten" Robert Maitland of New York. They edged GOTH: Matti's Slave Girl and Queen of GOTH (VVL), managed by Mattias Karlsson of Sweden, who won the U.S. Six-woman straps by adding Gothic Mistress (VVL) to the team. Successfully defending their World Six-woman titles were NME: Latoya Brown, Haruko Takahashi, and Andrea Brewer (WUL). Quite a feat by manager C.J. Frank of California!

 

WORLD TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

Francis Guy of Massachusetts claimed one-half of these titles with Jeff Jarrett and Chris Jericho (WWL). Originally holding the other half were SCA: Li Su "Imperial Guardsman and Lei Chan "Dragon Monk" (WKL), owned by C.J. Frank of California. However, due to some strategy confusion, their spot (and their $25,000 share of the prize money) was given to Frank's SCA/PWO: Stone Cold Steve Austin and Anthony Fazio of Illinois' Saruman (AAL), who rightfully had better point flow. There's no confusion that the top six teams in the tag standings had 516 points!

 

TOP 10 TAG-TEAMS

1. Jeff Jarrett & Chris Jericho (WWL)
SCA/PWO: Stone Cold Steve Austin & Saruman (AAL)
3. NVUS: "The Embalmer" Max Malice & "Malicious" Mark Morrigan (IML)
4. SCA: Eddie Vedder & Maynard James Keenan (CRL)
5. COT: "Diamond" Dezi Damage & Rocangus (JIL)
6. NVUS/GFY: Maniac Martin Riggs & Dr. Sam Loomis (WCL)
7. DSS: Kasket & Deadsmith the Cremator (IGL)
8. NVUS/GFY: The Tornado & the Hurricane (TML)
9. BOTD: "The Master" Masa Onita & "Rebel Angel" Jack Carter (ASL)
10. Victor Vonn Snapp & Badd Co. Rick Riley (BRL)

 

U.S. TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

DI: The Tank Tony Wayne and Jesse James Armstrong (YCL) had to fight to earn these $20,000 belts. They resorted to point flow, and came out victorious over NME: Harlan Ryker and "Rotten" Robb Maitland (TDL), plus DHM: Bull Pain and Simon Savage (MOL). Congratulations to manager Tony DeHart of Kentucky!

 

WORLD SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Claiming this title's engraved plaque or 15 free matches was Scott Bernes of Ohio, who led his team of CTI: "Big Stuff" Jay Cutler, "So Cut" Flex Wheeler, and "The Champ" Ronnie Coleman (IIL) to the win! The top six teams in the rankings had 521 points.

 

TOP 10 SIX-MAN TEAMS

1. CTI: "Big Stuff" Jay Cutler, "So Cut" Flex Wheeler, "The Champ" Ronnie Coleman (IIL)
2. DEAD: Wonderful Wally Brown, Sir Gunther Kinderwacht, Buda Von Blitzen (MIL)
3. UKA: Young Guns Clint Rhodes, Sean Masters, Stan Steel (NFL)
GOTH: The Vampire Lord Kal Zakath, Electric Current, the False Prophet (HHL)
5. GOTH: The Dressed Wombat, Sheik Hassent Ben Sober, the Illustrious Ishtar (FWL)
6. SCA/PWO: "The Silver Legacy" Joey Legend, Gandalf, Aragorn (AAL)
7. UKA: Saddat El Saajid, Sim Sim Ala Singh, Ragh Bagah Ali (JDL)
8. DTP: Willy "The Chocolate Lover" Wonka, Davon "Can't Miss a Dumpster" Fulla, Bry-Bry (HTL)
9. NVUS/GFY: The Tornado, the Blizzard, the Hurricane (TML)
10. WWW: Dutch Doomsday, Sammy Solar, Dr. Doom Dex Storm (SHL)

 

U.S. SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Scott Bernes of Ohio also took the U.S. six-man straps last time. CTI: "Loathsome Legend" Lance Thorn, "Repulsive Romantic" Raine Thorn, and "Sadistic Smile" Samantha Rose (IIL) were the only TV six-man champions to score a perfect 521. Great job!

 

TOP 10 MONEY HOLDERS

1. IIEII: Izzy Stradlin (RHL) $16,379,000
2. EDGE: Darian Tomb (ECL) $16,200,400
3. COT/ALLIANCE: The Survivor (HAL) $10,441,400
4. DFI: American Freedom Fighter E.J. (SHL) $10,011,338
5. WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (QPL) $9,829,100
6. nWo: Evil Wonder Woman (WUL) $9,786,500
7. PA: King Krusher (PKL) $9,462,000
8. JL6: The Hooded Inmate (IML) $7,690,700
9. "Mr. Powerful" Ken Lambeau (PKL) $6,887,000
10. DC: Diesel Duddick (NSL) $6,491,400

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

Listed below are the most active leagues for the August cycle, based on the number of matches. Also listed is the average strategy total for each (using active wrestlers only). Managers in the WKL, which scored the highest average, get two matches for $1 next cycle!

1. MRL (1,371 matches) 476.000
2. DIL (964 matches) 481.690
3. HTL (694 matches) 488.622
4. ASL (663 matches) 489.434
5. ECL (650 matches) 489.935
6. KKL (627 matches) 478.262
7. WKL (609 matches) 491.031
8. TDL (606 matches) 490.375
9. JIL (605 matches) 488.824
10. IGL (546 matches) 471.935

 

TOP 10 VICTORIES

1. EDGE: Darian Tomb (ECL) 7,328-1,455-304
2. "Mr. Powerful" Ken Lambeau (PKL) 5,266-754-113
3. COT/ALLIANCE: The Survivor (HAL) 3,732-788-191
4. WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (QPL) 3,643-1,204-214
5. PAIN: Dragon Tzu (AAL) 3,393-1,623-255
6. IIEII: Izzy Stradlin (RHL) 3,229-543-94
7. PAIN: Manitou (AAL) 3,218-1,611-242
8. PAIN: Cougar - WK (AAL) 3,173-1,637-249
9. JL6: The Hooded Inmate (IML) 3,138-679-133
10. nWo: Evil Wonder Woman (WUL) 2,731-1,166-169

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

IRON FEDERATION: Battling Titans, Danger Zone, Heart Throb, Iron Man, Lethal Weapon, Mount Olympus, Murder Incorporated, Northern Lights, Quick Pin, Women Unite, Yankee Clipper

STEEL FEDERATION: Devil Inside, Fierce Warrior, Hired Assassin, Intense Impact, King Kong, Mid-Atlantic Region, Praying Mantis, Red Hot, Sterling Silver, Vicious Valkyries

GOLD FEDERATION: All Star, Battle Royal, Blood Bath, Chicago Legends, Eastern Stars, Gold Digger, Hit Man, Living Nightmare, Ninja Dojo, Olympic Gold, San Francisco, Texas Death

DIAMOND FEDERATION: Axe Blade, Chaotic Rebellion, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Fractured Jaw, Jack Hammer, Last Breath, Lights Out, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Saber Tooth, Wild Kingdom

BRONZE FEDERATION: Alter Ego, Coffin Filler, Famous Talent, Glory Bound, Grim Reaper, Iron Glove, Mat Action, Mat Mayhem, New York, Odin's Blood, Trouble Maker, Wild America, World Championship

JADE FEDERATION: Atomic Age, High Rollers, Jade Dragon, Just Incredible, Kansas City, Lovely Ladies, Psychotic Killer, Super Hero, Total Package, World Wrestling

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