|
|
HIRED ASSASSIN LEAGUE |
|
| BULLETIN #113 -- JULY 2025 |
|
| Card 1: Held in Sparks (Attendance: 261) |
|
EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers destroyed CURE: "Under Contract" BJ Penn at 19:16 (The Preppy Killer) by 9.
COT: Chaos Machine beat SOS/SIENAMART: Man in Burreeseto Costume at 29:21 (Chaos Theory) by 5 (non-title).
BAZINGO the Magical Maniacal Clown bested The Apex Predator at 17:51 (Circus & Bread) by 9.
COT: Order Machine* and Chaos Machine pinned Jason Voorhees* and He-Man Most Powerful Man in the Universe at 14:49 (Spike Piledriver) by 24.
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine outmuscled EDGE: Mr. Diehard John McClane at 34:30 (Chaos Theory) by 2. |
|
| Card 2: Held in Belfast (Attendance: 469) |
|
EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux pinned CURE: "Under Contract" BJ Penn at 22:47 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 6.
EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay destroyed SOS/SIENAMART: Allah Snackbar, Lord of the Snack Bar at 29:38 (Pimp Slap) by 3.
COT: Chaos Machine beat COT: Shadow Machine at 21:57 (Chaos Theory) by 7.
COT: Order Machine* and Chaos Machine overpowered IMT/47: Ching Chong Jones and Flatten the Curve* at 24:00 (Spike Piledriver) by 8.
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine outmuscled EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux at 54:24 (Chaos Theory) by 1. |
|
| Card 3: Held in Mentor-on-the-Lake (Attendance: 521) |
|
West Coast title: CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway won over SOS/SIENAMART: Deathmatch Danielle from HR at 28:14 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 2.
COT: Chaos Machine won over SOS/SIENAMART: Allah Snackbar, Lord of the Snack Bar at 24:42 (Chaos Theory) by 7.
COT: Order Machine outmuscled CURE: "Under Contract" Anderson Silva at 27:20 (Order of Magnitude) by 3.
IMT/47: We Are In This Together, The New Normal, and Virtue Signaling Male Karen the 13th* defeated Wally Brick*, Martin Dean, and Drake in 6 at 4:42 (Cross-Armbar) by 38.
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine decked EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay at 57:24 (Chaos Theory) by 4. |
|
| Card 4: Held in Lynn (Attendance: 520) |
|
CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway bested EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay at 27:39 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 4.
SOS/SIENAMART: Store Greeter Frank Friendly outmuscled CURE: "Under Contract" Quentin Jackson at 29:25 (Bear Hug) by 4.
COT: Chaos Machine bested IMT/47: Ching Chong Jones in 6 at 17:42 (Mounted Punches) by 8.
Martin Dean*, Flex Lewis, and SOS/OMR: Demolition Man over He-Man Most Powerful Man in the Universe* in 11 at 5:23 (Count Out) (handicap).
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine beat SOS/SIENAMART: Man in Burreeseto Costume at 59:51 (Chaos Theory) by 5. |
|
| Card 5: Held in Lynchburg (Attendance: 901) |
|
TV title: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers defeated COT: Chaos Machine at 28:50 (The Preppy Killer) by 2.
SOS/SIENAMART: Store Greeter Frank Friendly annihilated IMT/47: Ching Chong Jones at 27:14 (Bear Hug) by 4.
CURE: "Under Contract" Georges St-Pierre pinned IMT/47: Flatten the Curve at 29:04 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 5 (non-title).
TV Six-man titles: COT: Shadow Machine*, Jurassic Machine, and Mammoth Machine defeated Fred Brown, Tim McCormick, and Outlaw Ben Slick* in 6 at 1:48 (Shoulder Breaker) by 85.
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine destroyed COT: Jurassic Machine at 50:47 (Chaos Theory) by 4. |
|
| Card 6: Held in Budapest (Attendance: 413) |
|
FREEDOM FUNZION: Mike Adams "The Canada Giant" over VIRUS: "Mr. Mucho" Juan Peso in 12 at 2:26 (Disqualification: loaded elbow pad).
COT: Chaos Machine beat SOS/SIENAMART: Store Greeter Frank Friendly at 15:55 (Chaos Theory) by 8 (non-title).
COT: Chaos Machine beat COT: Super Ghost Machine at 20:03 (Chaos Theory) by 7.
IMT/47: We Are In This Together*, The New Normal, and Virtue Signaling Male Karen the 13th annihilated COT: Shadow Machine*, Jurassic Machine, and Mammoth Machine at 23:01 (The Cycle of Death) by 6.
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine defeated IMT/47: Flatten the Curve at 25:52 (Chaos Theory) by 7. |
|
| Card 7: Held in Yonkers (Attendance: 836) |
|
FREEDOM FUNZION: Mike Adams "The Canada Giant" outmuscled He-Man Most Powerful Man in the Universe at 24:27 (The Super Stabber) by 9.
CURE: Hammer overpowered SOS/SIENAMART: Siena Martin at 28:12 (Hammered) by 3 (non-title, ladder).
Mid-Atlantic title: CURE: Hammer outmuscled COT: Jurassic Machine at 28:52 (Hammered) by 4 (street fight).
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine annihilated SOS/SIENAMART: Siena Martin at 29:17 (Chaos Theory) by 3. |
|
| Card 8: Held in Macao (Attendance: 895) |
|
Jason Voorhees overpowered VIRUS: "Dirty Magnum" Ray Calhoun at 18:46 (The Victim) by 9.
COT: Chaos Machine outmuscled SOS/SIENAMART: Siena Martin at 28:23 (Chaos Theory) by 3 (non-title).
COT: Chaos Machine beat COT: Jurassic Machine at 28:30 (Chaos Theory) by 4 (non-title).
Main event: COT: Chaos Machine defeated SOS/SIENAMART: Store Greeter Frank Friendly at 47:03 (Chaos Theory) by 8. |
|
| Card 9: Held in Tuscaloosa (Attendance: 784) |
|
IMT/47: We Are In This Together over Jason Voorhees in 13 at 13:42 (Disqualification: refused to break choke).
COT: Jurassic Machine defeated CURE: "Under Contract" Quentin Jackson at 19:44 (Jurassic Jawbuster) by 8.
COT: Order Machine drew IMT/47: We Are In This Together (Time Limit).
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers pinned COT: Chaos Machine at 29:32 (The Preppy Killer) by 2. |
|
| Card 10: Held in Brussels (Attendance: 336) |
|
FREEDOM FUNZION: Jeremy "Kane" Potvin destroyed The Apex Predator at 28:46 (The Potvin Driver) by 2.
EDGE: Mr. Diehard John McClane annihilated Fred Brown in 6 at 2:51 (Mounted Punches) by 137 (non-title).
COT: Order Machine tied COT: Chaos Machine at 4:30 (No Contest).
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers overpowered COT: Order Machine at 28:55 (The Preppy Killer) by 2. |
|
| Card 11: Held in Dothan (Attendance: 273) |
|
CURE: "Under Contract" Georges St-Pierre over FREEDOM FUNZION: Jeremy "Kane" Potvin in 11 at 4:23 (Count Out).
COT: Super Ghost Machine defeated Fred Brown in 6 at 2:10 (Shoulder Breaker) by 135.
East Coast title: IMT/47: Virtue Signaling Male Karen the 13th defeated EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay at 28:05 (12th Booster) by 4.
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers annihilated SOS/SIENAMART: Deathmatch Danielle from HR at 43:35 (The Preppy Killer) by 4. |
|
| Card 12: Held in Huntsville (Attendance: 980) |
|
COT: Chaos Machine annihilated SOS/SIENAMART: Deathmatch Danielle from HR at 28:31 (Chaos Theory) by 2 (non-title).
COT: Mammoth Machine bested Fred Brown in 6 at 2:55 (Hammerlock) by 129.
COT: Chaos Machine defeated EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay at 27:50 (Chaos Theory) by 4 (non-title).
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers beat SOS/SIENAMART: Allah Snackbar, Lord of the Snack Bar at 47:38 (The Preppy Killer) by 9. |
|
| Card 13: Held in London (Attendance: 856) |
|
EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux bested SOS/SIENAMART: "Reese's Brother" Ronald Rutledge at 28:47 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 5.
COT: Chaos Machine destroyed Fred Brown in 6 at 1:55 (Mounted Punches) by 136 (non-title).
EDGE: Martin the Fly Brundle drew COT: Chaos Machine (Time Limit).
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers outmuscled COT: Super Ghost Machine at 34:29 (The Preppy Killer) by 9. |
|
| Card 14: Held in Cheyenne (Attendance: 733) |
|
COT: Chaos Machine pinned SOS/SIENAMART: "Reese's Brother" Ronald Rutledge at 24:21 (Chaos Theory) by 6.
COT: Super Ghost Machine defeated Outlaw Ben Slick in 6 at 5:32 (Shoulder Breaker) by 88.
EDGE: 976-EVIL destroyed COT: Chaos Machine at 29:50 (Evil Calls) by 3 (non-title).
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers defeated IMT/47: Ching Chong Jones at 27:36 (The Preppy Killer) by 14 (Guest Referee: Opposite Man). |
|
| Card 15: Held in New Philadelphia (Attendance: 372) |
|
Great Lakes title: CURE: "Under Contract" Georges St-Pierre outmuscled SOS/SIENAMART: Man in Burreeseto Costume at 28:11 (Scorpion Deathlock) by 3 (cage).
Central Plains title: COT: Chaos Machine annihilated EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux at 28:26 (Chaos Theory) by 1.
COT: Chaos Machine overpowered IMT/47: The New Normal at 28:15 (Chaos Theory) by 2.
Main event: EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers pinned SOS/SIENAMART: "Reese's Brother" Ronald Rutledge at 25:32 (The Preppy Killer) by 8. |
|
| Card 16: Held in Pierre (Attendance: 767) |
|
EDGE: 976-EVIL won over SOS/SIENAMART: Man in Burreeseto Costume at 20:02 (Evil Calls) by 8 (non-title).
SOS/OMR: Natural Born Killer destroyed Flex Lewis at 21:02 (Cradle to the Grave) by 8 (return match).
COT: Chaos Machine defeated IMT/47: Flatten the Curve at 23:28 (Chaos Theory) by 7 (non-title).
Main event: EDGE: 976-EVIL defeated EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers at 46:51 (Evil Calls) by 1. |
|
| Battle Royal: Held in Tirana (Attendance: 543) |
|
CURE: Hammer earned $1,000 in imaginary earnings when COT: Shadow Machine threw him out.
COT: Chaos Machine pocketed $1,100 after EDGE: Mr. Diehard John McClane flipped him out.
CURE: "Under Contract" Georges St-Pierre earned $1,200 when EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers catapulted him out.
CURE: "Under Contract" Quentin Jackson pocketed $1,300 when he was thrown out by EDGE: Mr. Diehard John McClane.
COT: Super Ghost Machine snatched $1,400 after he got flipped out by EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers.
EDGE: Andrew Dice Clay was awarded $1,500 when EDGE: Martin the Fly Brundle hurled him onto the announcer's table.
EDGE: Martin the Fly Brundle snatched $1,600 after he got thrown into his manager at ringside by EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers.
COT: Order Machine collected $1,700 in imaginary money when he was thrown onto the announcer's table by COT: Jurassic Machine.
COT: Jurassic Machine collected $1,800 after he was thrown into some fans at ringside by COT: Shadow Machine and EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux.
COT: Shadow Machine won $1,900 in imaginary money after CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway threw him out of the ring.
COT: Mammoth Machine earned $2,000 when EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux and EDGE: 976-EVIL threw him out.
EDGE: Mr. Diehard John McClane gained $2,100 when he got thrown outside the ring by CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway.
EDGE: Robert the Mega Murderer Chambers received $2,200 in imaginary money after EDGE: 976-EVIL flung him out of the ring.
EDGE: Bloodsport Frank Dux gained $2,300 when CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway flung him out of the ring.
EDGE: 976-EVIL won $2,400 in imaginary earnings after he was thrown out by CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway.
CURE: "Under Contract" Max Holloway won the HAL battle royal and the $40,000 prize. |
|