IWA REPORT
Vol. 22, No. 11 -- August 2017
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HALL OF FAME INDUCTEES -- engraved plaque

Glenn Mazura of Virginia

IMT/ARMY: Mercury (LWL) 1,137-306-73, $2,051,800 *14

W.P. Mills of Wisconsin

Johnny "2 Kold" Koolakowski (IGL) 10,479-410-81, $14,951,500 *105
A longtime fixture on all three of the IWA's "Top 20" lists, "J2KK" has decided to hang up his mirrored sunglasses. Originally a babyface called "Jumping" Johnny, his career changed and he earned his new name when his lovely valet was attacked at ringside. He rushed to her side -- and then fired the unconscious woman for bleeding on his ring robe! He made his name in the Lights Out League, where he was part of a World Six-man championship team. Perhaps his greatest run saw him hold the LOL title for five cycles in a row, an incredible streak which he capped off by winning the Diamond Federation title. He later transferred to the IGL, where he won the Bronze Federation championship, and in time even conquered the IWA U.S. title.

His manager, W.P. Mills, is also about to retire. He thanks the IWA and the many managers who made the game fun for so long, and encourages everyone to try the NBL and ECL for great competition and great reports!

 

WORLD, U.S., KING OF THE RING

World Champion

IMT/ARMY: The Scorpion (OSL)
Jeff Chambers of Iowa; 501; $300,000 + 100 free matches or a real wrestling belt & 50 free matches

U.S. Champion

IMT: Big Blank #1 (CWL)
David Trousdale of Michigan; 501; $60,000 + a plaque or 25 free matches; edged EMPIRE: "Triple X" Extreme Xavier Ximenez (IWL)

King of the Ring

VIRUS: Blue Dragon of Destiny (ECL)
Mitchell Morrissey of Missouri; 500; a plaque or 25 free matches; 272 KotR total; hold positions were 4, 5, 8, 9, 10, 12, 13, 14; battle royal hold positions were 1, 2, 3, 6, 7, 10, 11, 15

 

SPECIALTY TITLES -- $25,000 + 10 free matches

American Champion

KDSN: Kim's Former Boyfriend TJ Jackson (LOL)
Matt Yunick of New York; 501

Asiatic Champion

KDSN: Materialistic Kimberly Kardashian (KHL)
Matt Yunick; 500; edged ARMY/IMT: "Rated MA Renegade" Tyreese Crenshaw (JDL), VIRUS: Big Daddy J. Super Ballz (DXL), VIRUS/MM: Skyblade the Tiger King (ECL)

Hardcore Champion

KDSN: Kim's Future Husband Matt Y. (XWL)
Matt Yunick; 500; edged IMT/ARMY: Doom (PKL)

Metropolitan Champion

EDGE: Enforcer Shane Douglas (BRL)
Joshua Haight of Wisconsin; 500; 35 free matches; edged BLOOD: Victor von Snapp (IWL)

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS -- $40,000 + 25 free matches

Iron Federation Champion

KDSN: Kardashian Faithful #1 (CSL)
Matt Yunick of New York; manager retained title; 499; edged VIRUS: Emperor Doom (XPL)

Steel Federation Champion

IMT/ARMY: The Scorpion (OSL)
Jeff Chambers of Iowa; 501

Gold Federation Champion

EDGE: Enforcer Shane Douglas (BRL)
Joshua Haight of Wisconsin; 500; edged KDSN: Materialistic Kimberly Kardashian (KHL), BLOOD: Victor von Snapp (IWL)

Diamond Federation Champion

KDSN: Kim's Former Boyfriend TJ Jackson (LOL)
Matt Yunick; 501

Bronze Federation Champion

KDSN: Selfies Queen Kim Kardashian (EHL)
Matt Yunick; 499

Jade Federation Champion

ARMY/IMT: "Rated MA Renegade" Tyreese Crenshaw (JDL)
Donald Henry of Illinois; 500; edged IMT/ARMY: Doom (PKL), VIRUS: Big Daddy J. Super Ballz (DXL)

 

NATIONAL, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS -- $20,000

National Champion

EDGE: Heathcliff Sharples (HSL)
Eugene Quintana of California; 501; a plaque or 25 free matches; Prairie region

Atlantic Champion

IMT/ARMY: Guillermo "Willie" Hernandez (AOL)
Jerry Anderson of Michigan; 501

Central Champion

EDGE: Ryan Q (AOL)
Eugene Quintana; 500; edged IMT/ARMY: Human Bedpan (PKL), IMT: Ashara Dayne (NFL)

Dixie Champion

EDGE/H25: The Legendary Assassin (KHL)
Joshua Haight of Wisconsin; 500; edged VIRUS: The Beast of LeGevaudan (ECL)

Eastern Champion

IMT/LPPF: Lester (GRL)
Michael Eaves of Mississippi; 500; edged KDSN: Talented Kimberly Kardashian (XWL), IMT/EXILE: Immortal Odin (NBL)

Mountain Champion

EDGE/H25: Justin Gold (KHL)
Joshua Haight; 501; edged VIRUS: Seth Rollins (HWL)

Northern Champion

"Powerful" Pete Savage (NAL)
"The Game" from Parts Unknown; 501

Pacific Champion

EDGE/H25: The Silly Doctor (KHL)
Joshua Haight; 500

Southern Champion

IMT: El Hijo de Machete (MML)
Robbie "Blood" Pawelek of Chicago, Illinois; 500; edged VIRUS: Johnny "The Jet" Flammingo (ECL), IMT/ARMY: The Hitman Aiden Anderson (AOL)

Western Champion

KDSN: "Princess" North West (PKL)
Matt Yunick of New York; 500

 

LADIES' TITLES

Ladies' World Champion

IMT/LPPF: Misfit Diva #1 (FFL)
Keith A. Maple of Ohio; $40,000 + a plaque or 15 free matches; edged previous champion IMT/LPPF: Alexandra (MDL), VIRUS: Barbara Bush (LLL)

Ladies' U.S. Champion

KDSN: Swimsuit-Clad Kourtney Kardashian (VVL)
Matt Yunick of New York; $20,000; edged VIRUS: Bruce Jenner "The It Version" (LLL), Rydia Stormer

Queen of the Ring

Aurora Rose (RWL)
Randall Angel of Louisiana; 269 QotR total

Ladies' National Champion

KDSN: Dash Employee Durrani Popal (LLL)
Matt Yunick; 500

Ladies' Tag-team Champions

IMT: Whatever Doesn't Offend You & Microaggression (RWL)
Anthony Fazio from Parts Unknown; 516; edged VIRUS: Michelle "Looney Bin" Obama & Patchy the Pirate (MDL)

Ladies' U.S. Tag-team Champions

VIRUS: Rosanne Bar & Sensational Sherry (LLL)
Frank Jay Belcher III of Michigan; edged Krush Gals: Lioness Itsuko & Chigusa Ogyu (RWL), VIRUS/CTI: Zombies #4 & #6 (VVL), NGAA: Rydia Stormer & Mara O'Connor (MDL)

World Six-woman Champions

KDSN: Lingerie-Clad Kimberly, Kourtney, Khloe Kardashian (MDL)
Matt Yunick; manager held titles 3 cycles in a row

VIRUS: Latoya Jackson, Arianna Piranha, Pimp of the Nation (LLL)
Frank Jay Belcher III

IMT: Shield Maidens of Rivendell, Rohan, Gondor (RWL)
Anthony Fazio; 521

U.S. Six-woman Champions

IMT: Shield Maidens of Moria, Mordor, Isengard (RWL)
Anthony Fazio; 521

 

TAG-TEAM TITLES

World Tag-team Champions

EDGE: Fox & IMT/ARMY: Greich (QPL)
Eugene Quintana of California & Jeff Chambers of Iowa; Quintana held titles 4 cycles in a row, Chambers 3 in a row; share of $50,000 + 15 free matches

H25/EDGE: UNLV Rick Star & Evan Rude (BRL)
Rich Schwartzenburg of Canada

UKA: The Hateriot & Ike "Chocolate Thunder" Jones (KHL)
David Silliman of New York

IMT: "MST3K" Professor BoBo & Tom Servo (HWL)
David Trousdale of Michigan

IMT: Siberian Bull Ivan Stolichnaya & IMT/ARMY: Dangerous Dudley Moore (MML)
Anthony Fazio from Parts Unknown & Jerry Anderson of Michigan

Top Contenders

6. EDGE/CHOSEN: Mr. White & Mr. Blue (AEL)
ranked #9 last time
EMPIRE: "Triple X" Extreme Xavier Ximenez & "The Main Event" Dillon Matthews (IWL)

8. Demolition Ax & Smash (NSL)

9. EDGE/H25: Pacific & Western Champs Mike Cook (APL)

10. ARMY/IMT: "Street Hustler" Yardie & "Urban Disciple" Joker Skott (AAL)

11. VIRUS: Rainmaker Okada & Brain Buster Butch (XWL)

12. EDGE/CHOSEN: Scandalous Steven Valor & Illustrious Ian Idol (KKL)

13. EDGE: Droids X9 & Y1 (IML)

14. Beast & Bones (CWL)

15. VIRUS: Sir Arrogance JPM & Andre Linoge (HLL)

16. VIRUS: Umbrella Corps & Z-Nation (NFL)

17. Buster Stonewall & VIRUS: "Mr. Wonderful" R.A. Rude (LWL)
ARMY/IMT: "Mack Daddy of Violence" Rodney Pierce & "Silencer" Eddie Camden (CZL)
last of the teams with 516

U.S. Tag-team Champions

IMT/ARMY: Asmongold & EDGE: Vermin (QPL)
Jerry Anderson & Eugene Quintana; Quintana held titles 3 cycles in a row, Anderson retained titles; share of $20,000

IMT/ARMY: Forklover & IMT: Luchador Blood #12 (MML)
Jeff Chambers & Robbie "Blood" Pawelek of Chicago, Illinois

ARMY/IMT: "Hardcore Luchador" El Muerte Rojo & Madman Schrodinger (CZL)
Donald Henry of Illinois

KDSN: World's Greatest Sisters Kim & Khloe K. (AEL)
Matt Yunick of New York; 516; edged KDSN: Little Brats Kylie & Kendall Jenner (HWL), EDGE: Clown Prince & Cautionary Tale (HLL), Daniel Plainview & Cyrus "The Virus" Grissom (NSL), VIRUS: Machine Gun Karl Anderson & Guzinga (XWL), EDGE: Niopolis & J4 (XPL), EDGE: A Species of Worm & A Hyena in a Cage (IML)

 

SIX-MAN TITLES

World Six-man Champions

EDGE: Warren Slappy, IMT/ARMY: Masked Wrestler #2, Buzz Kutt (QPL)
Eugene Quintana of California, Jerry Anderson of Michigan, Jeff Chambers of Iowa; Chambers held titles 7 cycles in a row, Anderson 5 in a row, Quintana 4 in a row; share of $50,000 + 15 free matches

IMT: Milanese, Genoese Mercenaries, IMT/ARMY: The Guy who played Katsumoto (OSL)
Anthony Fazio from Parts Unknown & Jeff Chambers (Katsumoto)

KDSN: Hated Paparazzi #1, #2, #3 (MUL)
KDSN: Kim's Warm, Comfy, Cozy Fur Coats (HWL)
Matt Yunick of New York; manager held titles 3 cycles in a row

VIRUS: Leptospirosis, Schistosomiasis, Chikungunya (MML)
Frank Jay Belcher III of Michigan; ranked #4 last time

VIRUS: Hazard, Riot, Dread (BBL)
VIRUS: Dysentery, Black Death, Plague (EEL)
Randall Angel of Louisiana

EDGE/H25: Big Helen 6, The Mandy Runner, Real Stella (APL)
Michael Cook of Kentucky

EDGE/CHOSEN: Horsemen 1, 2, 3 (JDL)
Rich Reilly of New Jersey

Top Contenders

10. EDGE: Loose Cannon, Hammer, Brutal Mitchell (BRL)
ranked #10 last time, #7 before that, missed U.S. titles by point flow before that

11. EDU: The Engineer, The Philosopher, The Riverdancer (NSL)

12. EDGE/CHOSEN: Mr. Orange, Mr. Pink, Mr. Brown (AEL)
ranked #3 last time, #10 before that, #6 before that; last of the teams with 521

U.S. Six-man Champions

EDGE: Chadwick Duckworth, IMT/ARMY: Towelliee, Snorch (QPL)
Eugene Quintana, Jerry Anderson, Jeff Chambers; Chambers held titles 5 cycles in a row, Quintana 4 in a row, Anderson 3 in a row; share of $20,000

IMT/ARMY: Survival Hunter, IMT: Fazzy the Baker, Luchador Blood #5 (MML)
Jeff Chambers, Anthony Fazio, Robbie "Blood" Pawelek of Chicago, Illinois

IMT: Icon, Make America Great Again, Inalienable Rights (NDL)
Kevin Elrod of Ohio

KDSN: "Naughty Girls" Kim, Kourtney, Khloe Kardashian (MUL)
Matt Yunick; manager held titles 3 cycles in a row

VIRUS: The Dippy Hippy, HPV, Flatulence (WEL)
Frank Jay Belcher III; 521; edged IMT/ARMY: He Who Flung Poo, IMT: Sicilian, Venetian Mercenaries (OSL)

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

1. BRL (1,326 matches) 491.279

2. LWL (1,145 matches) 492.000

3. IWL (779 matches) 493.967

4. NWL (734 matches) 466.636

5. CWL (504 matches) 492.754

6. MML (419 matches) 491.764

7. UNL (416 matches) 490.577

8. NSL (415 matches) 493.438

9. LNL (380 matches) 492.474

10. WEL (370 matches) 494.268
won the two matches for $1 cycle for having the highest average strategy total (counting only active wrestlers)

 

TOP 20 MONEY HOLDERS -- active wrestlers only

1. Kaptain Kryptonite (NBL) $38,493,000

2. LPPF: Medieval Tymes (XPL) $25,971,700

3. VIRUS: Mike Drake (HWL) $25,543,000

4. Arsenal (APL) $20,729,500

5. IMT/LPPF: Misfit Messiah (BRL) $17,799,800

6. IMT/BLOOD: Sir Gunther Kinderwacht (BRL) $17,281,100

7. DFI: American Freedom Fighter E.J. (SHL) $16,492,238

8. VIRUS: Cpl. Punishment (LBL) $13,639,000

9. SITH: Darth Thanatos (NSL) $13,277,500

10. SITH: Darth Carnage (NSL) $13,071,100

11. SITH: Darth Ravage (NSL) $13,004,000

12. SITH: Darth Avatar (NSL) $12,799,800

13. NGAA: Hawkeye Science (HLL) $12,708,300

14. SITH: Darth Bedlam (NSL) $12,601,800

15. NGAA: Rydia Stormer (MDL) $11,167,800

16. Dan the Man (HSL) $10,752,300

17. IMT/BLOOD: Wonderful Wally Brown (GRL) $10,245,900

18. Death Warrant (CWL) $10,216,900

19. MWC: Pete the Geek (IGL) $9,389,400

20. MWC: "Mr. Minnesota" Olaf Gustavson (QPL) $9,075,500

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

Iron Federation

Center Stage, Extreme Existence, Hardcore Wrestling, Heroes and Legends, Iron Man, Main Event, Quick Pin, Xtreme Poison

Steel Federation

American Wrestling, Classic Championship Wrestling, Intense Impact, King of Kings, Louisiana Swamp, Man Up, New Blood, Old School, Vicious Valkyries, World Domination

Gold Federation

All Star, Battle Royal, Blood Bath, Continental Wrestling, Global Wrestling, Independent Wrestling, Knight's Honor, Mexican Mayhem, Mystic Diva, National Wrestling, Ninja Dojo, Texas Death, Triple Threat

Diamond Federation

Action Packed, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Fractured Jaw, Lethal Brawling, Lights Out, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Non-stop Action, Rajun Cajun, Xtreme Wrestling

Bronze Federation

American Extreme, American Outlaw, Extreme Hardcore, Grim Reaper, Hardcore Superstars, Iron Glove, Living Nightmare, Revolution Wrestling, Strong Style Wrestling, United Nations

Jade Federation

Atomic Age, Combat Zone, Deluxe Wrestling, Jade Dragon, Lone Wolf, Lovely Ladies, Psychotic Killer, Super Hero, True Grit, Wrestlers Elite

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