IWA REPORT
Vol. 13, No. 14 -- October 2008
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IMAGIMANIA XXIII: IMAGILYMPICS


100 METER DASH
  Gold - LPPF: Dynamic Danny Dynamite (GRL) - Mitchell Morrissey of Missouri
  Silver - MCM: Vitamin Z (SAL) - Zach Harper of Illinois
  Bronze - TB/COMMISH: The Devil's Disciple (KKL) - Frank Jay Belcher III of Michigan

10,000 METER RUN
  Gold - Harley Mace (MRL) - Nicholas Hill of Georgia
  Silver - Morning Shooter (APL) - Austin Swarts of Illinois
  Bronze - ROA: Luscious Cheyenne (TCL) - Eva M. Cote of Maine

BENCH PRESS
  Gold - MD: Steve "The Master of Darkness" Stoedter (MEL) - himself of Utah
  Silver - LPPF: Wonderful Wally Brown (IGL) - Mark Duchaine of Vermont
  Bronze - APA: ASP (MSL) - Joe Adams of Pennsylvania

DISCUS THROW
  Gold - Morning Shooter (APL)
  Silver - TB/COMMISH: Yur Mama (KKL) - Frank Jay Belcher III
  Bronze - TB/COMMISH: The Devil's Disciple (KKL)

HIGH JUMP
  Gold - MD: James "The Lord of Darkness" Stoedter (MEL) - Steve Stoedter
  Silver - MD: Steve "The Master of Darkness" Stoedter (MEL)
  Bronze - ACE: Enforcer (RYL) - Tony Robinson of Florida

HURDLES
  Gold - Morning Shooter (APL)
  Silver - Midnight Shooter (APL) - Austin Swarts
  Bronze - TB/COMMISH: Yur Mama (KKL)

JAVELIN
  Gold - GLBT: "Rainbow Warrior" Davey McPride (GRL) - Michael Koch of Wisconsin
  Silver - MD: Rector Valkut (MEL) - Steve Stoedter
  Bronze - LPPF: "Lord Humongous" Axel Blade (DIL) - Mitchell Morrissey

LONG JUMP
  Gold - RWS: Roderick Strong (XPL) - Michael Drake of New York
  Silver - RENEGADE: Eric "The Cobra" Langdon (MIL) - Edward Ledeger, Jr. of California
  Bronze - Butcher Kerek (DDL) - Ryan Oskar of Ohio

POLE VAULT
  Gold - RWS/AOD: 8-Ball (RCL) - Johnny Watts of Texas
  Silver - AWC: Eternal Chaos (NGL) - Curtis Spiker of Florida
  Bronze - LPPF: Wyld Stooge Curly Esquire (GRL) - Keith A. Maple of Ohio

SHOT PUT
  Gold - Dustin Roads (MRL) - Nicholas Hill
  Silver - Rammer Jammer (SAL) - Gary Hixenbaugh of Alabama
  Bronze - HHS: Cujo (THL) - Curtis Roberts of Colorado

 

JOHNNY B SAYS

Due to popular demand, we're bringing back the IWA American title! Beginning in the November cycle (after the upcoming Fall cycle), the league champions of the XPL (Iron Federation), OSL (in the Steel), ASL (Gold), ABL (Diamond), SAL (Bronze), and AAL (Jade Federation) will compete for $25,000 in imaginary money, plus 10 free matches for the winning manager. Transfer a wrestler or create a new wrestler in one of these leagues to get in on the fun!

Please note that you are limited to a maximum of 4 wrestlers in the XPL, 7 wrestlers in the ABL, and 6 wrestlers in the SAL. The other three leagues have the usual limit of 10 wrestlers per manager. Also, you cannot transfer existing wrestlers into the SAL without permission from the league commissioner.

 

HALL OF FAME INDUCTEES

X-RAIDED: Super Stud Biff Backhand of the ASL is entering our Hall of Fame this cycle! This former World Champion (from the December cycle of 2005) accumulated an incredible 5,416 wins during his time in the ring, had only 856 losses, and drew opponents 236 times. His lifetime earnings were $11,792,300, and he enjoyed 53 cycles with a strategy total of 495 or more. Congratulations are in order for his manager, Ian Greaves of New York, who will receive an engraved plaque!

 

WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION

"Rule number 76: No excuses -- play like a champion," said his tag-team partner, Jeremy Grey. "Wedding Crasher" John Beckwith (AAL) would heed those words by crashing the IWA title scene. Beckwith won the IWA's most prestigious honor, the IWA World Heavyweight Championship. His manager, Howie Sandberg of New York, is now a 4-time World Singles Champion. Sandberg couldn't be more proud of his wrestler. IWA reporters got these words from Howie, via the ACE 24/7 News Network: "I've been preaching the advice of Jeremy Grey to IWA managers for over two years now. I'm elated to add Beckwith to the list of wrestlers who have won major titles for me throughout my legendary career. Beckwith has represented the Alliance of Championship Excellence dynasty in fine fashion."

 

U.S. CHAMPION

Tony Robinson of Florida kept this title in his stable's possession by coaching ACE: HBK (OTL) to a 500-pointer! HBK picks up $60,000 in imaginary money, and Tony gets his choice of an engraved plaque or 25 free matches. Great job!

 

KING OF THE RING

LPPF: A.C. Steel (JDL) earned an engraved plaque or 25 free matches for Pennsylvania-based manager Rob Bream by having the best (273-point) total after we added the values of hold positions 2, 3, 4, 8, 9, 11, 12, and 14 in the strategy of every league battle royal winner! Those victors were decided using hold positions 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 13, and 15.

 

ASIATIC CHAMPION

LPPF: J.C. Steel (JDL) added another $25,000 to his bank account by retaining this title! Rob Bream of Pennsylvania will receive 10 free matches as a reward for helping his athlete achieve this impressive accomplishment.

 

HARDCORE CHAMPION

This $25,000 title went home with CC: Akiro (GRL)! His manager, Dan Wiberg of Florida, earned 10 free matches for himself since he was the one who supplied the 500-point strategy.

 

CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION

Manager Daniel Swann of North Carolina proved that he knows his way around a wrestling ring by leading E$T: Human Highlight Reel (RBL) to point flow victory over DA: The Nightmare (SGL)! His grappler's finisher, the "Instant Replay," won him $25,000 in imaginary money. Daniel's coaching won him a very real 10 free matches!

 

FEDERATION PLAY-OFFS

Manager John Lala of California gained 25 free matches when his wrestler, JL6: Da Prison Ghost (IML), took home the Iron Federation title. Mike Moore of North Carolina claimed both the Steel and Gold Federations, with WWW: Buda Von Winnershong (OSL) and WWW: Systematic Assassin (BBL), respectively! Each had a 499 total. In the Diamond Federation, ACE: Kolo (FJL) won big for Bob Dippy of Pennsylvania. Hardcore Champion CC: Akiro (GRL) picked up the Bronze strap for Dan Wiberg of Florida. He had 500 points, as did eventual World Champion ACE: "Wedding Crasher" John Beckwith, who kept the Jade title in New Yorker Howie Sandberg's hands! ILL: Evil Eric Cartman (ICL) missed the Jade honors by point flow.

 

NATIONAL CHAMPION, IWA-WIDE REGIONALS

After conquering the Eastern region, ACE: Fusion Hellfire (GRL) overpowered the other regional winners to earn an engraved plaque or 25 free matches for Tim Williams of Michigan! Taking the remaining titles were...

Atlantic: ACE: Enforcer (RYL)
Tony Robinson of Florida owns this 2008 Imagilympics High Jump bronze medalist
Central: ACE: 667's Brother-in-Law Scott (GRL)
under contract to Tim Williams
Dixie: MP: Deacon Diogenes (MPL)
managed by David Schinkus of Kansas
Mountain: ACE: Napalm Rocket (GRL)
coached to victory over CTI/NVME: Mr. Perfect (WWL) by Tim Williams
Northern: LPPF: Vicious Vinnie Valentino (GRL)
property of Mitchell Morrissey from Missouri; edged Takeshi Morishima (WWL) and LL: Whirlwind (SHL)
Pacific: ACE: The Franchise Derek Jeter (PKL)
managed by the Notorious ACEhole; edged out CC: Guillotine the Executioner (GRL)
Prairie: CTI/NVME: Simply Ravishing Rick Rude (WWL)
owned by Grant Matthews of Canada; used point flow against ACE: The Maniacal Masseur (GRL)
Southern: Devastation (KSL)
tore it up for "StableKing" Eric Sickler of Virginia
Western: ACE: Sinister Sid Skyscraper (BRL)
wrestles with the Notorious ACEhole at ringside

 

LADIES' TITLES

ACE: Sensational Stacy Whiskey (MDL) became our newest Ladies' World Champion with the help of Michael Eaves from Mississippi! Michael wins an engraved plaque or 15 free matches. "The Ugandan Goddess" Kamalana (VVL) gained the Queen of the Ring title for Ryan Oskar of Ohio by edging out RWS: Lethal Vixen of the MDL (who also lost the title by point flow last time). The Ladies' U.S. champion was WWW: Sunny Blaze (LLL), who is managed by Luke Fletcher of Georgia. The Notorious ACEhole held onto the Ladies' National honors, this time winning it with ACE/420: Mary Jane Greene (LLL)! LPPF: Knockout Specialist Rebecca Streets and Bloody Assault Jessica Lee Richards (VVL) took the Ladies' tag straps, then manager Keith A. Maple of Ohio added Awkward Curves Dizzy Denise Hamhock to the team and they won the World Six-woman titles! Next, Keith paired his LPPF: Gothic Angels #2 and #3 with previous Ladies' World Champion Nikki Blair (LLL), managed by Rob Bream of Pennsylvania, and together they claimed the U.S. Six-woman championships! Taking home the Ladies' U.S. Tag-team belts were ILD: Beautiful Bailee from B-Town and "The Goddess" Alicia NeSmith (LLL). They are managed by Alexandra Willhite of Missouri!

 

WORLD TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

LPPF: "Hazzardous" Bo and Luke Duke (IIL) had the only 516 total out of all our league tag-team champions last cycle, so their manager, Keith A. Maple of Ohio, wins the choice between an engraved plaque and 15 free matches! Congratulations also go out to the Great Susuki and Masa Hiro Sasaki, who moved up a spot in the rankings from last time.

 

TOP 10 TAG-TEAMS

1. LPPF: "Hazzardous" Bo & Luke Duke (IIL)
2. COT: "100% Texan" Jason Ford & "River City Rambler" Adam Wright (OTL)
3. ACE: Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush & Otis B. Driftwood (GRL)
ACE: Aldo Montoya & Sparky Plugg (BWL)
5. LPPF: Nasty Nick Slaughter & Bodacious Bobby Brutal (ECL)
LPPF: The Demon Panther & Awesome Adam Diamond (ALL)
7. STUD: Fat Andy & the Bowl God (MIL)
8. ACE: The Insurance Policy & "Mr. OSL" the Survivor (OSL)
9. ACE: The Great Susuki & Masa Hiro Sasaki (HML)
10. CTI: Little Man from Another Place & Mike the One-Armed Man (LSL)

 

U.S. TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS

History was made, as LPPF: Aunt Mary (IIL) became the first female wrestler to win a man's major in all of the years of the IWA! She teamed with Uncle Mike to win the U.S. Tag-team titles for manager Keith A. Maple of Ohio! Their team total was a perfect 516.

 

WORLD SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

Bob Dippy of Pennsylvania earned an engraved plaque or 15 free matches when his team of ACE: "Mr. Dribble" Ace, "Blitzkrieg" Jack, and "Riverboat Hustler" Deuce Diamond (NAL) defeated the competition for these $50,000 purses! The top six teams listed had 521 points. Previous winners T.L. Hopper, Kwang, and Mantaur remained on the list!

 

TOP 10 SIX-MAN TEAMS

1. ACE: "Mr. Dribble" Ace, "Blitzkrieg" Jack, "Riverboat Hustler" Deuce Diamond (NAL)
2. CTI: Little Man from Another Place, Mike the One-Armed Man, Killer Bob (LSL)
3. LPPF: Cousin Timothy, Aunt Mary, Uncle Mike (IIL)
4. ACE: Inbred Ned, Inbred Jed, Inbred Ed (MEL)
5. LPPF: The Demon Panther, Awesome Adam Diamond, Lone Wolf Xavier Sanchez (ALL)
6. CTI: The Game, the Cerebral Assassin, Triple H (XPL)
7. CTI: The Woodland Critter, General Disarray, Professor Chaos (PPL)
8. EDGE: Trailer Park Boys J-Rock, Trevor, Cory (LOL)
VNV: Neal "The Jazz Man" Sax, Captain Blue, "Darling" Dean Willis (HSL)
ACE: T.L. Hopper, Kwang, Mantaur (BWL)

 

U.S. SIX-MAN CHAMPIONS

LPPF: Bodacious Bobby Brutal, Nasty Nick Slaughter, and SAMHAIN: Johnny Slaughter (ECL), managed by Mitchell Morrissey of Missouri, pocketed $20,000 apiece after they defeated all other TV six-man teams to win these titles! They had 521 total team points.

 

TOP 10 LEAGUES

Going by the number of matches, the most active leagues for the September cycle appear below. For the seventh consecutive cycle, the Grim Reaper League sat atop the list! The Mid-Atlantic Region League continued to closed the gap, and now its managers have the advantage of choosing to take two matches for $1 next cycle (instead of paying our regular prices), since their active wrestlers had the highest average strategy total out of all 10 leagues! The LLL and UWL each finished less than half a point behind the MRL.

1. GRL (1,152 matches) 487.198
2. MRL (1,098 matches) 491.946
3. ASL (907 matches) 487.710
4. XPL (639 matches) 488.511
5. UWL (638 matches) 491.558
6. MBL (590 matches) 487.436
7. MEL (561 matches) 466.949
8. NAL (539 matches) 488.122
9. NSL (516 matches) 487.250
10. LLL (513 matches) 491.596

 

TOP 20 VICTORIES

(Inactive wrestlers were not included on this list.)

1. "Mr. Powerful" Ken Lambeau (PKL) 8,825-1,051-188
2. Johnny "2 Kold" Koolakowski (LOL) 4,845-149-36
3. RENEGADE: Eric "The Cobra" Langdon (MIL) 4,839-1,378-191
4. WWW: Mike White Lightning Moore (QPL) 4,837-1,444-264
5. JL6: The Hooded Inmate (IML) 4,486-887-176
6. PAIN: Dragon Tzu (AAL) 4,168-1,788-336
7. PAIN: Manitou (AAL) 4,136-1,747-317
8. S4C: Willie Wino (NSL) 4,033-656-143
9. PAIN: Cougar - WK (AAL) 3,997-1,788-339
10. CC: Danny Boy O'Day (NSL) 3,984-768-158
11. CC: Oliver Shagnasty (NSL) 3,957-789-131
12. ACE: The Survivor (ECL) 3,801-855-202
13. ROW: Special Agent B.M.F. (JIL) 3,576-1,008-250
14. LPPF: Innovator of Arrogance Keith A. Maple (QPL) 3,572-131-74
15. LPPF: Sir Gunther Kinderwacht (NAL) 3,435-393-114
16. King Cobra (KKL) 3,371-352-50
17. E$T: The Franchise Zach Gargus (WSL) 3,332-462-70
18. DFI: American Freedom Fighter E.J. (SHL) 3,265-657-188
19. KOC: Cpl. Punishment (LBL) 3,191-243-58
20. Easy E. Joe Cool (CWL) 3,099-614-117

 

LIST OF LEAGUES

IRON FEDERATION: Center Stage, Danger Zone, Empire Wrestling, Extreme Existence, Hardcore Wrestling, Iron Man, Murder Incorporated, Mysterious Benefactor, New Generation, Quick Pin, Rising Stars, Slumber-party Massacre, Under Fire, Wrestling Superstars, Xtreme Poison

STEEL FEDERATION: Absolute Pain, Caribbean Coast, Devil Inside, Intense Impact, King Kong, Lost Souls, Mid-Atlantic Region, New Blood, Old School, Praying Mantis, Pressure Packed, Rebel Yell, Vicious Valkyries, Wild Panthers, Zeus Power

GOLD FEDERATION: All Star, Battle Royal, Blood Bath, Chicago Legends, Classic Wrestling, Dark Angel, Easy Rider, Federated Suns, Hit Man, Majestic Property, Masked Wrestling, Mystic Diva, New Millennium, Ninja Dojo, Texas Death

DIAMOND FEDERATION: American Bodyslam, American Legion, Bounty Hunter, Dark Days, Evil Clown, Femme Fatale, Fractured Jaw, Internal Rage, Last Breath, Lights Out, Night Falcon, Noble Savage, Non-stop Action, Rajun Cajun, Xtreme Wrestling

BRONZE FEDERATION: Alter Ego, Barbaric Warrior, Coffin Filler, Extreme Hardcore, Fightin' Irish, Grim Reaper, Hot Streak, Iron Glove, Knight Time, Main Event, Men of Steel, Old Timer's, Raging Bull, Soul Asylum, Torture Chamber, War Cry

JADE FEDERATION: Atomic Age, Iron Cross, Jade Dragon, Just Incredible, Just Rasslin', Killer Soldiers, Lone Wolf, Lovely Ladies, Psychotic Killer, Smoking Gun, Super Hero, Thor's Hammer, Total Package, Unknown Wrestler, World Wrestling, Wrestlers Elite

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